Being at war with yourself makes you feel like there is absolutely no way you'll be able to fight your way out.
It becomes too much for you to handle. Each day you wake up is only another day you feel farther away from who you were before.
You feel like you’ve lost yourself, and you have no idea how to find you again. I know it’s hard, and taking the easy way out seems so much easier.
It spares you from any more pain, and you would feel like so much less of a burden to everyone around you.
Everything hurts and you feel like nothing you ever do is right. Nothing you ever do is good enough.
But you’re wrong.
You have put everyone else ahead of yourself for far too long and now it’s starting to catch up with you. You suffer all alone because you feel like a burden, a bother to everyone else.
But you are not this toxic person you've convinced yourself you are, believe me. It's all in your head.
You're just so hard on yourself.
Everything happens for a reason, and maybe all those people who left were never supposed to stay in your life. You are worth so much more than what you have been giving yourself credit for.
It’s okay that you’re not perfect, you’re human. You are GOING to make mistakes. You are GOING to hurt people’s feeling sometimes.
You are GOING to upset people sometimes, just like they’re going to do all those things to you as well.
That does not make you a waste of space, damaged goods, or worthless because you are not your mistakes.
You just have to learn how to pick yourself up from the darkness that has surrounded you. Learn to believe in yourself, to not be so hard on yourself.
Give yourself credit for just being able to get out of bed. It may seem small, but it’s progress. It’s something. You do not need to take on the world, you just need to set small goals for yourself. And eventually, you’ll find yourself again.
I promise you that you are not alone in this fight, even if you feel like you are.
You just need to surround yourself with people who are willing to take the time to understand. People who are willing to wrap their arms around you when you are on the verge of a breakdown. People who are willing to hold you through the tears. I promise you, doing this alone isn’t the solution. You need to surround yourself with those who are willing to help you through it, not those that put on a show and only pretend to care. You need to be with people who make you feel wanted. Remember, family doesn’t always have to be blood.
Don’t listen to the people who are criticizing your every move. They don’t think you’re enough? Oh well! You’re better than them. You’re going to accomplish far more things than they ever do, so don’t let their negativity consume you. You do not need them. So stop letting it bring you down. You don’t need to be around people who throw everything you are doing wrong in your face. You don’t need to be around people who can’t ever see what you’re doing wrong.
There’s only one key to a more positive life. Take a deep breath and decide that today is the day you deserve it. Know you’re worth and claim the better life. Be the better person. Get your confidence back and just be happy living your life. You’re doing so much better than you have decided to give yourself credit for. But at the need of your life, it’s not going to be anyone else but you with the regrets, so just decide that today you’ve had enough of the bad days, go live your life. You deserve it, no matter what anyone else says.
I know you feel lost, but I think deep down, you know that you’re ready to be found. You just have to do the work to get there.