Knowing what I do now if we could go back in time to when it all began I would call you a fake, a coward, and call you out on how you ‘felt.’ I wouldn’t sit around wasting my time, all those memories wouldn’t exist, and this pain you made me feel wouldn't have left my heart shattered.
There’s a part of me that wants to hate you for making me feel worthless, that I wasn’t even worth the ‘goodbye’ text. All I was to you was a temporary fling that you didn’t believe deserved closure.
But there’s another part of me that part of me that just wants to be the bigger person, that will triumph and make me a better person than you ever will be.
That part of me wants to thank you and wish you well.
Thank you for allowing your true colors to come through, for letting me see what I was really getting. For giving me a much-needed reality check. Sure it sucks but hey, I definitely needed it if I thought you were worth my time.
Thank you for proving that people are not always who they say they are and that they don’t do what they say they will do.
Thank you for letting me get creepy good at social media stalking so I could find out if you were even okay if your phone worked, and if you were even on this planet.
Thank you for reminding me how amazing I am and for making me realize that I deserve someone equally as amazing as I am.
I will not pretend that you are a terrible person because you aren’t. I know you aren’t, however, I wish you were so I could hate you for what you did, or at least be more upset with you than I am. You are a great guy, which is why I was so blinded from your great qualities to not see your bad ones.
The truth is I am embarrassed I let you get to me, that I let myself trust someone who was never truly there. I was a fool to think that you cared about me the way that I cared about you.
Thank you for making me reevaluate my standards of what I want in love, I have definitely raised that bar significantly higher.
I do hope, however, that you find whatever it is you are looking for. I hope that it might take you a little longer than it should so you can experience some heartbreak and misery like you caused me, but I do hope at the end of this crazy life you are happy with someone, or a hundred cats.
I hope you do much better to whomever you find, unlike the way you did me. I hope she brings you happiness, and I hope she loves you with all she has, and you love her back the same way.
I am sorry that you could not appreciate all that I have to offer, that you won’t get to experience what this could have been, or how amazing we could have been. I am sorry you are missing out on the adventures with me, that you don’t get to experience everything that you said you wanted to experience with me.
But honestly, it’s your loss and never mine.
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