It wasn’t like we ended on bad terms or anything, it was just a loss of interest. There was no cheating or huge blowout fight, we just became so distant and distracted from each other and our love faded.
The moments of fireworks and butterflies were gone and what was left in their wake were two strangers.
I felt it happening, but I guess I just ignored it because I didn’t want to believe it. Because I really truly loved you, I didn’t want to drift away but life had other plans for us.
Our relationship had endless possibilities, but we never nurtured it. We lacked the discipline and time to look after it. So now that it’s gone and forever lost, I feel like a part of me is missing.
So much so that missing you has become the center of my life now.
I remember everything from the way you smell to the way you’d touch my cheek and reaffirm that you are the only thing holding me to this earth.
I was so stupid to let it slip away. I know it was my fault. I know that I should have held on tighter, loved deeper, or fought harder to save it.
And believe me, if I could stop thinking about you I would. If I could stop torturing myself with thoughts of what could’ve been, all the amazing times we had, how sweet your smile was… I would in a heartbeat, but that doesn’t seem like an option right now.
I know that I should be moving on; I should be out every weekend with my girls, but I can’t shake the thought of you. It’s like you come with me everywhere I go.
The shadow of our relationship is constantly just behind me and I don’t know if I even want it to leave.
I miss you.
I miss the ‘us’ that could have been.
I miss the everything we could’ve been.
And now, I feel like I will forever be lost in the memory you.
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