Everyone acts like you can fall in love with yourself in the drop of a hat, that you can find your face in the reflection and automatically see everything that is beautiful and good about your soul on the inside and the out.
The truth is, self love is a long and hard process. The ugly moments, the hardest moments, the ones that last too long are the ones that cultivate a love of self.
It isn’t repeating mantras and cutting carbs. Heck no—it’s even a little dark.
You fall in love with yourself by spending the night crying on the bathroom floor about things that tear your heart in two different, mangled pieces.
You fall in love with yourself when you feel so alone you feel like the world is yours and yours alone.
You fall in love with yourself when you feel so betrayed that you have no more trust for anyone but yourself.
You do not fall in love with yourself in perfect moments doing perfect things. You fall in love with yourself when you see that broken things are making you whole.
It’s not going to look the same for everybody, just like how every relationship differs from one person to another. One thing is usually common, though: you find yourself in the darkest places and work to lift yourself up.
There’s going to be a lot of sweat and tears, a lot of struggle, a lot of frustration.
But that’s what makes it all worth it. You’ll be able to look back and see something extraordinary has grown from the ashes that used to define you.
All that desolation and brokenness will have cultivated this garden, a forest, a world of beauty and possibility that you couldn’t have had before.
So today, in the midst of finding a deep rooted love for yourself, everything kind of sucks. You’re in a dark place. Nothing about the process seems beautiful in the slightest.
And it’s not—it won't be for awhile. But the results to come will be absolutely stunning.
Hold tight, you wonderful soul. I promise that out of this darkness something beautiful will come.
Even though it doesn’t seem like it right now, one day you will love yourself fully and completely.
It’s just a matter of time.
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