“He cheated on me but says he loves me...”
Are those the words that came out of your mouth after you found at that he cheated on you? It might sound harsh, and some people may disagree, but if a man cheats on you, he doesn't love you. In order for you to understand what I mean by this statement, think about what love really is.
Love is the most unselfish emotion that you can feel for someone.
Think about anyone that you love, your children, your mother, your father, or your family; would you go out and do something to intentionally hurt them?
When a person is in love they may be attracted to someone else physically. But if they're truly in love with another person though, they'll be able to control themselves. They should be able to deny their lust if their heart belongs to someone else.
If he's unable to understand that he should resist his lust, then he's really saying that he doesn't love you enough not to hurt you. That his own sexual desires matter more than his feelings for you.
He doesn’t really love you as much as he says he does.
I've seen many situations where a guy cheated and the woman forgave him, and now they're madly in love and the guy has really changed. I'm not saying it can't happen, but I caution all women to never be a doormat to a man. Never just let him cheat on you, tell you he loves you, and then you forgive him just like that.
The truth is, if a man is willing to cheat once then he will more than likely cheat on you again.
And the only person that is hurt in this situation is the woman being cheated on. Not the man! After all, he's getting sex from other women, why would he be hurt about that?
The only way to get back at a man who cheated on you and claims that he still loves you is to leave. If he loves you, then your absence should hurt him. If it doesn’t hurt him and he goes back to side chicks numbers one through three, then he didn’t love you in the first place.
If you leave and he loves you, then he should try his hardest, and I do mean his hardest to get you back. That includes cutting contact with all the other women he was ever involved with and doing whatever it takes to get you back.
If a man loves you, you should be able to feel it.
Don't allow him to tell you that his male instincts kicked in or that he was drunk or any other sorry excuse for why he was with another woman. More than anything do not give a man permission to treat you any way that makes you even slightly unhappy.
Remember that you always have the right to leave. Once you’re gone, his attempt to get you back will be a true test on if he really loves you or not.