I’m far from perfect. There are things I’ve done that I’d give anything to take back. There are moments I long to forget. My decisions have had terrible consequences.
I’ve hurt people that I truly loved, judged people I barely know, and let down those who only wanted the best for me.
And I can’t help but wonder: if you knew these things, if you saw my worst sides, would you love me anyway? Would you see me for who I really am, flaws, complexity, passion and all?
Would you be able to look beyond the mistakes I’ve made and see the person who only wants the best for everyone around her?
Would you notice the woman who feigns confidence but is secretly her own worst critic?
Would you see the person who spends so much energy trying to please everyone else that sometimes she just needs a break?
When my short fuse blows at the end of a long day, would you criticize me for my outburst?
When I’m down on myself for not reaching the (likely unattainable) standards I’ve set, would you point out the other ways in which I’ve failed?
When things don’t go as planned, would you place the blame on me?
Because the truth is, I already do all of that. And I don’t need someone to drag me down any further. I need someone to lift me up.
I need you to prove that despite my demons, I am enough.
To show me that you aren’t perfect either, to remind me, day in and day out, that nothing about me is enough to push you away.
Because knowing you can accept my darkness is the only way I'll let you truly see my light.