I miss you.
The brutal, painful, horrible, mournful, heartbreaking truth is that I miss you.
I miss every single thing about you and if I tried to name everything I missed about you, I would run out of paper and that’s impossible because there is no paper online. What I’m trying to say is that I would be at it forever. There is nothing in the world that would last long enough for me to try and describe how much I truly miss you.
I miss your soothing voice and the way that it's sound would calm me of anything that I was feeling. I knew that once you opened your mouth, your words would captivate my soul with the deep, sweet sound of your voice.
I miss the way that you would grab my hand in your car as we were driving home and listening to the music drown out the sounds of the cars around us.
I miss your texts. They didn’t ever need to be heartfelt, but just the fact that you thought of me in the early hours of the morning, the busy hours of the afternoon and the sleepy eyed, late hours of the night made my heart feel so warm.
I miss your mind. You were so smart and you had so much to talk about all of the time. It was as if a library existed inside of your skull alone.
I miss your laugh. There’s no sound quite like it and there isn’t one that I like even the slightest bit better than yours.
I miss your smile. I’ve never seen this happen in real life until I was with you; people talk about a person’s smile having the ability to light a room and yours did. It lit up every single one that you walked into.
I miss your sense of humor. Not everybody got it, but that didn’t matter. You said some of the dorkiest, funniest things I’ve ever heard and to this day, the expressions on your face as you would say them and your laugh afterward are imprinted in my mind. I can see them. I can see you.
I miss your sweet personality and the way that you handled certain situations.
I miss your ambitions and goals and I miss supporting you through them. When you decided that you wanted something, you didn’t stop until you got it and I think that’s what hurts the most.
If you wanted me, you would come get me.
If you wanted to be mine again, you would work your butt off until you were. You would do every single thing in your power to make sure that we were together.
But we’re not.
Instead, someone else is admiring your voice.
You are grabbing someone else’s hand with your fingers.
Someone else is smiling at your texts.
Someone else is learning about your mind and trying to understand everything that goes on inside of it.
Someone else is laughing along with you.
Someone else is watching the way that your smile touches lives.
Someone else is enjoying your sense of humor and laughing until their sides hurt.
Someone else is seeing the way that you respond and act upon things.
Someone else is supporting you do what you love and they’re watching you become the great man that you are.
To say that I miss you is an understatement. You became a part of me and the truth is, I miss myself too.
I wonder if you think about me. I wonder if you miss me too.
I wonder if you miss the little things. I wonder if you miss the things that I didn’t even realize I was doing.
But it will remain as it is; a wonder. A thought...