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I Will Forever Be “Auntie” and I’m Okay With That

Mommy. The one thing I always wanted to be called. Ever since I can remember, I wanted to be a mom.

You’ll change your mind, everyone told me.

They said that once I had to get up with a screaming baby in the middle of the night, being a mom wouldn’t seem so glamorous, but I did, and it did.

I still couldn’t wait. Every day I had people telling me what an amazing mom I’d make, and I would smile and say thank you, I can’t wait.

Now, I just give a half-hearted smile and nod.

Because now, I know.

I now know that being “mommy” is something that won’t happen for me.

I’ve accepted that though. I’ve accepted that I won’t be a mom, and it’s just made me a better auntie.

I have the title of “auntie” to more than one tiny human and they are the best thing that’s ever happened to me.

Every moment with my nieces and nephews is one that I cherish, knowing that to them, just for a short time, I am their whole world.

So when mom asks me why I bought them a new outfit, for the thousandth time, or why we went on another “special date,” that cost half my paycheck, this is why.

I could sit around moping about never being a mother, or I could take that love and give it away, the best way I know how.

I will be a sister and a cousin, I will be a daughter and a wife, but mostly I will be an auntie.

I am and will forever be “auntie” and with that comes all the love of a mother, with the sugar and spoiling of a grandparent, and the fun of a sibling.

I may not get to have babies of my own, but I get to be an auntie forever, and I’m okay with that.

I’m okay with taking the kids for now and bringing them home all sugared up.

I’m okay with being the fun aunt.

I’m okay with just being auntie.

As much as I have always wanted to be “mommy,” I have accepted that it may not happen.

So, for now, being Auntie will be good enough for me.