It's true when they that temporary relationships change you. It doesn't matter if they are romantic or not. They have a way of shaping you.
And it is not always good. In facts sometimes it hurts you more than you ever wanted too hurt. Sometimes it makes you question everything that happened between you was a lie.
Sometimes the one's you always thought you would keep around. They are the so called friendships you thought you would be able to hold onto.
But they tend to be temporary for whatever reason...
They lead you down paths of wondering what life will be like without those people in it. The in's and outs of people you once loved, who then became strangers is often chaotic.
It is filled with feelings of internal battles. Do you stay in contact with them, will they still care. You are left asking the tough questions. Wondering all the things you might have hardly ever paid any mind too.
But when people tell you that they can change you, it's the truth. You go through the ups and downs of wondering if you'll find new people who will make an impact on your life in the same way.
You become stretched, maybe a bit more closed off to trusting others. Your walls become just a little bigger. It is your defense fortress to all things hurtful.
Maybe you started picking your friends a little more interchangeably. Maybe a little less than you used to, do you hang out with so called associates.
Because of temporary friendships that never lasted, you've learned your lesson.
You've learned you would rather have the people by your side who will be there, than the ones who seemingly never wanted to be.
You become grateful for the lessons learned, and the kinds of people who were there for a short while. You maybe try to harbor not ill feelings toward them. But it is hard when left so much damage.
Yet you find ways to cope. Even when it is so hard to do so.
You find ways to find yourself again. To see the beauty in a life full of loss.
Friendships are intimate. Every time you spend time sharing pieces of yourself with someone else, it is a lasting memory. So yeah, when they don't always work out...when those relationships fade, it cuts you to the core.
But the thing is they are so important to have. Maybe a least a few times in this life. Because you see temporary or not, you are left with memories...of lasting lessons.
And you will use them to grow. You will tell yourself one friendship didn't work out and you will find ways to take those parts and invest yourself a little more in other friendships.
You will learn that opening your heart to others is difficult, and even when your walls are high, you will learn you need good people in this life.
Lessons can come at crossing points of life, and it is so important to keep that as a focal point of life. It is not easy and I understand that. But at some point you begin to see the whole picture.
That temporary friendships teach you things about yourself you never thought could be there. And you grow from such lessons. You develop from such lessons.
And then, somewhere down the line you see life a little more clearly. And they help you grow, by allowing you to see the kinds of relationships you really need in this life.
And that is beautiful.
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