How do I put into words how much I hope for you to find someone who cares so deeply about you, they would do anything to make sure you stay in their life? How do I find the words to tell you it isn’t him.
It isn’t the guy who made so very little effort to keep you a part of his life in a healthy way. The guy who you want to start letting back in.
Something he doesn’t deserve in the slightest.
At what point has he ever done anything to deserve to know any more parts of who you are?
At what point does everything he did to tear you apart, somehow disappear?
The answer is never.
I get that I haven’t been with or dated that many guys. I get that you might see my advice as invalid. But I do know this.
I know what guys are worthy to be in my life.
Whether or not things eventually fade, none of the guys I’ve been with have ever made me feel like I’m the one who is lucky to be with them. Instead, they are the ones who feel lucky to be with me – because they tell me and show me that.
Unlike the one you want so badly to be back in your life. Something we will have to agree with me not ever understanding.
Your friends don’t like him. Your family doesn’t like him. It will be a 'pick him or us' situation. And I’m scared to know that answer.
Call me overprotective. Call me naive. But there’s no coming back from how he treated you.
I get that this is hard - trust me when I say I get it. I get that you are holding on to something you thought was meant to be.
But honestly, you’re only seeing his “good” side. The side he apparently only showed when he wanted to. Instead of it being his dominant personality.
You’re missing the fact that he is a grown man who treated you like no person should ever treat another.
You make excuses for him and consistently blame yourself for everything that happened. Let me tell you this – you don’t owe him anything.
Yes, mistakes were made – on both parts. But had he just manned up and done what he should have done, this might have been different.
But he didn’t.
He lost you. So let it be. Let him realize what he missed out on and learn.
He doesn’t need to be your friend. He doesn’t need to be someone you confide in or knows what you’re doing in life.
He doesn’t deserve it.
He doesn’t deserve to have such an incredible person in his life. But there is someone out there who does. Someone who has been looking for you in every face they meet.
Go find him.
Because it is going to hurt you more to be his friend than it will be to completely walk away.
I won’t apologize for not liking him. I won’t apologize for not being okay with you talking to him again.
But I will stand by your side to make sure he doesn’t get another chance to walk all over you.
For more of Ariel's work, like her on Facebook!