Defining happiness as, a measurement based upon the happiness of those who surround us, is almost like a proxy, really.
The problem with this is that often times we become so prone to pleasing others, that we often neglect ourselves without even realizing it.
Our happiness matters -- WE matter -- but this goes so unnoticed that it innately becomes a habit to ignore our own happiness.
And the sad reality of the whole thing is, it takes someone else to remind us of this, otherwise we're completely blindsided by the neglect we're placing upon ourselves.
We become so vulnerable to placing ourselves second, that innately, everyone else learns to put us second (because that's the lesson we've repeatedly taught time and time again).
We have no problem taking others happiness and thoughts into consideration, but we find tremendous difficulty in considering ourself.
It's almost as if we feel guilty for putting ourself first and above everyone else.
We don't make a single decision or have a single thought without being mind-trapped by the thought of "everyone else."
It's a constant -- what would so-and-so think? How would so-and-so feel? Would this make so-and-so happy? And never a time of thinking -- how do I feel? What do I want? What would make ME happy?
But let me be the first to say ...
And as difficult and challenging as this may realistically be.
It's time to put ME first. Time to stop neglecting my own happiness. And time to start putting my life and my life only in my own hands.
It's time to live my life as I choose and let everyone else figure it out on their own. My life should not revolve around everyone else's.
After all, what fair is it that I allow their life to dictate mine while I allow them to put me second?
There's nothing wrong with being a considerate human being, but there's serious issues with (unconsciously) neglecting yourself.