What exactly is closure? What is this thing that we strive for? What is this painful thing that keeps us up late at night months and months late wondering what went wrong or how things could've ended differently?
Closure is something different to everyone.
Some say, we never actually get closure, but instead, we are left to find our own. I’m not sure I agree. It seems that closure is whatever we need it to be.
Closure is learning whatever we wanted to know or understand prior to the relationship ending, that we never really got the answers to.
But what happens when we never get closure?
We're stuck with these unresolved questions and feelings that we just can’t move past. That door that stays partially open and haunts us when we struggle to fall asleep at night.
It’s the quiet, lingering pain that hangs around even after days and days of feeling like you have moved on.
It’s the nagging feeling that keeps your ex on the back of your mind. It’s the feeling that comes to mind when you drive by a certain place or hear a certain song. It’s the hold that your ex still has on you.
It’s the feeling of urgency to send a text even though you know you shouldn’t. You just want to check in, maybe ask how they are doing, which deep down you know would lead to negative conversing or arguing that would bring you back to a worse state of mind.
The feeling is always there. Maybe extra after you have a dream, have one too many drinks or see a posted picture on social media. But regardless, the feeling still remains.
It makes moving on harder than any relationships you've had in the past. It has left open wounds and scars that although have started to scab over, still sting.
Not just anyone can understand, not unless they’ve been there.
It’s a process, one that is much, much, harder than most battles you’ve had to overcome.
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