So you've found a potential new bae and you're thinking about taking the commitment plunge. Slow down there, Speed Racer - have you even vetted this guy yet? How do you know he's worth taking that dive? Before you go rushing off into anything too crazy, take a step back and think about it
1. Does he treat you with respect always?
Respect is often the most underrated, but most important aspect of a relationship. You need to respect each other if you ever expect a relationship to be healthy and progress in the right direction.
2. Can he bring brightness into your dark days?
Does this boy make you laugh, even when you aren't feeling funny in the slightest? Humor is another huge aspect of a relationship. If you're not laughing, you're not having fun. And isn't that kind of the whole point?
3. If he was the exact same person he is now in ten years time, would you still be interested?
Often when you put it in a future perspective, you'll realize those little quirks that are cute now wouldn't be so cute down the road. People don't usually change, remember that.
4. Are you physically attracted to him?
Attraction may seem simple, but oftentimes people dont think it's that important. Nobody likes to admit it, but the truth is though looks aren't everything, if you're not attracted to him on a carnal level... there's no chemistry.
5. Do you have similar interests?
Yeah, opposites do attract, and you don't want to date someone who's a carbon copy of yourself, but at the same time you want to be able to bond over some manner of shared hobby or distraction. Though they do not all have to be the same, it can't hurt to have at least a few things in common to talk about.
6. Do you both have the same personal issues/emotional baggage ?
This may seem like a good thing, but a lot of the time it spells out destruction and can lead to detrimental mental issues. If you both had a neglectful family? Chances are you will be unhealthily addicted to one another. This is where being slightly opposite each other really pays off.
7. What are his political/religious beliefs?
People discount this way easier than they should, but you really can't afford to, especially if you want to really commit to this person. A lot of the times this is a dealbreaker, and it oftentimes isn't revealed until you've already become emotionally invested.
8. How does he feel about children and marriage?
This is another deal breaker. Here's the thing: if he doesn't want marriage/kids in the future now, chances are he never will. You cannot get into this relationship thinking you'll be able to change his mind and then be surprised five years down the road when he still isn't interested in that path.
9. Does he inspire you to be a better person?
This is so, so, SO important. The thing is, a significant other should invoke feelings in you to want to become a better version of yourself. No, they shouldn't want to change you. But they should make you feel like nothing is impossible with them on your side.
10. How does he make you feel?
Does he make you feel invincible? Happy? Blissful? Or does he make you feel just comfortable or content? Or even stupid? If you just feel content, that's settling. And you should never do that. It's great to be comfortable in a relationship, but you should most importantly be happy. If he makes you feel unworthy, he is not someone you should ever be with.
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