A Brutally Honest Letter To The Asshole Ex.

Dear Ex,

I’ve had so many mixed feelings in regards to writing this letter. To start off, I want to say that I hope that you’re not as shitty now as you were before, because let’s face it, you were VERY shitty.

But I loved you anyways.

We had good times and had a great connection. Or, I thought we did. Even though I loved you, you chose to break my heart and almost break my spirit.

I was a damn good girlfriend to you. I did everything you wanted and then some. I went out of my way, multiple times to make sure that you were happy, and that was never good enough. I spent so much time, effort and money on you, but you didn’t seem to care. Instead of appreciating what you had, you chose to pick fights with me about anything and everything, call me names, belittle me, lie to me, cheat on me, alienate me, and so many other things….and I stupidly let you.

There are so many times when I look back on our relationship…

and want to punch myself in the face for staying with you as long as I did. I don’t look back and think of all of our “wonderful” times, because they’re only plagued with horrible times right after. Things between us never stayed good for long.

To be honest, there were other guys that took interest in me, but I chose to turn them down; for you. They showed me more respect in the small amount of time we talked, than you ever did in our entire relationship. Looking back now, I never should have gone out with your sorry ass, especially when I saw those red flags.

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Guys, If You Don’t Want Us to Get “Attached” Then Stop Leading Us On

All she wants is stability. To know that her heart is safe in your hands. But apparently, that’s too much for you.

No, she’s not looking for a one-night stand. She wants something real with someone who isn’t going to end up hurting her just like all the others.

Is it really that hard to be honest, loyal, and upfront with her? She’s not perfect and she doesn’t claim to be but for you, she’d give you her absolute best. Literally, every human being has baggage, and she knows that. That’s why she’s so open to letting this be something with you.

And yet here you are. Instead of being real with her, you tell her you’re into her but don’t mean it. She never had a shot with you and never will, but God forbid you lose one of your ‘options.’

She finally has this feeling in her gut that you’re not going anywhere, that you’re finally her’s. And that’s when you disappear. No warning, no text, nothing.

She let her guard down for you, do you realize how hard that was for her? She doesn’t do that for just anyone and you took it for granted, you left her.

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This Is How You Know You’re Most Definitely Dealing With A Narcissist

Have you ever had someone in your life that said or did absolutely disgusting things to you? Have they ever made up such bullshit stories that you knew were lies but in their mind, it was the absolute truth? You’re dealing with a Narcissist.

Narcissism – the actual definition of narcissism is: the pursuit of gratification from vanity or egotistic admiration of one’s own attributes.

Narcissists are master manipulators. They cannot distinguish the difference between fantasy and reality.

Have you ever met a narcissist? Are you with one now? If you’re not sure, I’m going to give you 5 easy ways to spot one and then provide secret confessions from actual people that are dealing or have dealt with narcs.

1. They LOVE to talk about themselves.

Every conversation the two of you will have centers around them. You’ll never be able to get a word in, and if you do, but it’s not in agreement with the narcissist, your comments are likely to be corrected, dismissed, or ignored.

2. They don’t know what the hell boundaries are.

they completely disregard other people’s thoughts, feelings, possessions, and physical space. Narcs overstep and use others without consideration or sensitivity. They borrow items or money without returning – so good luck EVER getting anything back. They’re notorious for breaking promises and obligation, they show little to no remorse and blame the victim for one’s own lack of respect.

3. They think they’re entitled to EVERYTHING.

They expect everyone to cater to their needs and demands, without doing anything in return. Selfish assholes.

4. They’re master charmers.

they like to make the supply feel special and wanted but to their own gratification. They don’t do it because they’re genuinely interested in the person, it’s to make sure that once they have their hooks in you and their true colors show, you’re not able to leave them. Love bombing to the max.

5. They always put the blame for their failures on everyone else.

Come on dude, we know it’s YOUR fault. It’s not someone else’s fault that you failed school, lost a job, your relationship ended, or any of that shit. It’s all YOU. You are the reason your life sucks.

Aren’t narcs fun? If you were planning on saying the opposite of no, then please take your face and smash it into the nearest desk or wall because NO narcs are not fun. That was a rhetorical question.

Below are secret confessions from people that have dealt or are currently dealing with narcs.

He told me that “I bet your teachers at school must really hate working for you. You are probably really difficult to work for. You should probably start exercising and trying to tone.” And when I lost twins; miscarried one and then 6 weeks later the second one: “you knew this was coming. I don’t know why you are upset.”
He told me that I deserved to be raped by my ex because I refused sex.
He told me by text that he had been to the doctors and they told him he had weeks to live with kidney cancer!!! I work on a ward full of palliative patients!!! I knew a general practitioner could not give a diagnosis like that at a first appt because they would need blood tests and hospital appts!!!!
He told me that I should seek therapy, for issues between my mom and I were the cause for our problems (which my mom and I have no issues), to make me feel like I was the cause of our lack of intimacy, while she was leading a double life with a coworker!
He told me that I’m a freak for suffering child abuse.
He said he was single when in actual fact he was engaged. What kind of a sick prick cheats on his fiancé for ten months out of their engagement???
He said he had a brain tumor!! Seriously…. he looked healthy, and always drank alcohol. Got 2 be kidding me.
He told me that he hasn’t cheated on me, that he hated me more than he loved our daughter, & that loving me sucked.
He told me that I was worthless, replaceable, used up and a whore. He told me that he was going to make sure that I got my son taken from me because he hates me that much – I have no record. I don’t drink, I don’t do drugs, I don’t do anything except work and go home to my son.
Mine told me that he cheated on me the entire time we were together, took multiple girls’ virginities and that I was a dumbass for not being able to see it….yet he claims I cheated on him.
He said he never really loved me. He was only with me for my money.
He told me that he sold his food stamps to his mother to pay for his child support.
Nothing a narcissist says is true. Their entire life is built upon lies and being frauds. It doesn’t matter if it’s just a “little” lie, it’s still a lie.
When you finally learn how to stand up to the abuser, they are so quick to turn the tables and cry, the victim. Always remember, they are not the victim. They created all of the hurt, the lies, the betrayal, etc. There can’t be victims of the circumstances THEY created.

Being emotional, psychologically, mentally, or physically abused is NEVER okay and no one deserves it.

10 Signs You’re Dating the Guy You Should Be Running Away from

Bad relationships happen all the time and even in those bad relationships, we’re all secretly hoping for that fairytale ending. Regardless of you wanting that happily ever after, if your boyfriend treats you like absolute shit and he does these 10 things (or more), then you need to lose that fucktard.

1. He doesn’t allow you to talk to other guys, but he can talk to whomever he wants. Even if it’s someone you’ve been friends with for years because thinks you’re secretly hooking up with this person. He’s insecure and super jealous.

2. He goes through your phone but hides his. Even when you’ve done nothing wrong, and every time someone texts you, he makes you show him because he thinks you’re lying to him, but when someone texts him, he turns his phone away from you because it’s “none of your business”.

3. He talks negatively about your past before the two of you met. Whether it’s about what color your hair was, how much you weighed, what clothes you wore, etc.

4. He literally blames you for everything. Even when it’s not your fault, he somehow turns it all around on you, because it’s easier for him to make you feel guilty.

5. He is never, ever happy for you. Unless it somehow has to do with him.

6. He’ll manipulate the shit out of you and put himself first in the relationship, doing what he wants to do. He’ll decide what movies you’ll watch because they’re his favorites, what music you’ll listen to because he doesn’t like what you listen to, etc.

7. He gets really frustrated and angry with you when he’s not the center of attention. Even when you have a bad day and want to be comforted, he only wants you to focus on him.

8. He makes you CONSTANTLY keep in contact, but takes forever to respond because he’s “busier” than you. If you don’t constant text him or call him, he gets mad at you and automatically thinks you’re cheating. Actually, everything you do is questionable because in his mind somehow you're always planning to cheat on him.

9. He talks down to you. He calls you names, belittles you, talks badly about your friends/family, your hair, makeup, clothes, or make you feel like you’re worthless.

10. He will alienate you from everyone. Your friends and family know that the person you’re dating is a sack of shit; and they will try to warn you.

You will think you’re so in love and you say that they don’t want to see you happy. You’ll question why they can’t see the good in him (let’s be honest, there’s nothing good about him). Your boyfriend will eventually make you choose between your friends/family and him. Always choose your friends and family!

If You're Feeling Broken Beyond Repair, Read This

I know what it feels like to feel like you’re broken beyond repair, but I’m here to tell you that you’re not. What you’re feeling is only temporary. This feeling won’t last forever, I promise you.

It might be a bad day, night, week, month, or even year, but it’s not a bad life. It’s only a bad text, a bad (current or ex) boyfriend, a bad grade, a bad number on the scale, or even a bad mistake, but I promise you until the end of the earth and back again, that it is never a bad life.

I’ve been where you are, and truth be told, I still have those days occasionally. I’ve laid in my bed for what felt like days. I’ve nearly drowned myself in post-break-up tears, I’ve sat in darkness and let the horrible memories haunt me.

I’ve told myself that the awful things I’ve been called are true, and I’ve completely ripped apart and ridiculed the girl that stares back at me in the mirror until I felt like I had nothing left to live for. But, here I am; still breathing and alive. So please, trust me when I say that those feelings you’re feeling won’t last forever.

I know how incredibly painful it is to be your own worst enemy, what it’s like to push away those who are closest to you because you feel like such a burden, and not want to get out of bed the next day.

I know what it’s like to shut down completely, say things you don’t mean, and do things you would never do in your right mind. I know what it’s like to feel betrayed, abused, lost, rejected, left behind and most of all, broken.

I know what it’s like to be the person that everyone feels sorry for and talks about behind closed doors. I know how it feels when you think you can never come back from feeling so low, but I promise you, that you can and will.

There are still some of deepest parts of your soul that have yet to be touched or ruined by anyone else, that you get to keep for yourself, and that gives you the ability to keep fighting those bad moments, bad days, or bad times. You will not be broken forever, I promise. You just have to keep digging, you have to keep fighting.

It’s not a simple thing to do, and honestly, some break downs will be worse than others. Sometimes it’s good to have a break down, it gives us the chance to get out everything that we’ve been bottling up.

Sometimes we need to hit what feels like rock bottom, so we know what it feels like and then we can build ourselves back up.

Don’t ever be ashamed or embarrassed for feeling like this, just don’t let it completely take over your life. You will get through this, I believe in you.

I Flat Out Refuse to Give Up on Finding an Old Fashioned Love

What did the actual fuck happen to romance? I want an old-fashioned love; I deserve that. I want to go back to where trust is earned, respect and effort are given, and time is valued. I flat out refuse to give up on finding an old fashion love.

We’ve become so guarded, that we never let our walls down. We don’t have real, deep, or meaningful conversations with anyone anymore. I don’t want to do that…I want to talk about your feelings, I want to know about your deepest darkest secrets and fears in life, your goals, where you see yourself in 10 years. your likes and dislikes, but most of all, I want respect.

I want you to respect me enough to tell me what’s going on. If there’s something bothering you, talk to me. I don't want to play stupid games, and I can’t read your damn mind. I don’t want to be another notch on your belt or just a piece of ass, I don’t deserve to be treated like that.

People nowadays refuse to put labels on relationships. We hang out all the time, talk to each other every day, we become intimate and do everything people do in a relationship but no, we are not boyfriend and girlfriend.

Instead of actually dating, we “talk” for a little while, a few months go by and then it’s the classic line of “I really like you a lot, but I’m not ready to be in a relationship right now…. but we can still hang out.”

I want and deserve someone that will put effort into getting to know me like I’m getting to know them. I don’t deserve to be led on and have my time wasted, and I definitely don’t deserve to have my feelings fucked with just because you’re unsure of yours.

Let's be real, putting a bit of extra effort into getting to know someone is better than just knowing someone on the surface. Even if things don't end up working out, at least you can walk away knowing that you had a real human interaction.

Call me a hopeless romantic, I don't care. I want the real thing because life is meant to be lived to the fullest and I refuse to half-ass my relationship experiences.

Ending an Almost Relationship Hurts, but My Heart Can Handle It

We were “just friends” with the benefits of what I wish were a relationship, without the actual title of one. We spent time together, held hands, kissed, touched each other in a sweet way that “just friends” wouldn’t do, and so much more.

For a while, things were going great in the No Commitment area, but then one day I started to realize, that I wanted more. I wanted a relationship. I wanted a boyfriend.

But, he didn’t want to be in a relationship with me, and even though in a way I knew we wouldn’t ever get to be in a relationship with each other, it still really hurt.

He made me believe the sweet nothings he whispered in my ear. The way he would touch my arm, or grab my hand had me thinking that he felt something for me, the way I felt something for him…but that wasn’t the case. He was just looking for the benefits of a relationship without the actual commitment of being in one.

I didn’t want to realize it at first, but when it finally hit me, it felt like my world was crashing down. I felt like I wasn’t good enough for him, felt like nothing I said or did mattered to him.

…but that’s not the case.

What I say and do matters. My feelings do in fact matter….I matter.

So, I will get over him. I will move on from this, I will find someone that truly deserves me and this is how I’ll do it.

I will accept my feelings and not keep them bottled. No, things didn’t work out with us, but I have every right to feel the way I feel. Recognizing what happened and how it made/makes me feel help me rationalize my thoughts.

I will rely on my friends to help me sort through my feelings. There’s nothing like the overall emotional support your true friends can provide during rough times.

I won’t think about what could have been. Yes, I do wish things would have worked out, but in the end they didn’t and even though it hurts, I won’t spend all of my time thinking about the “what ifs?”

I’ll be grateful for the time we had together. He taught me not to settle for anything less than what I deserve, and even though he hurt me, and I’m grateful for the lesson.

I will focus on myself. I won’t jump right back into dating, because I’ll just end up getting hurt again. I’m going to take this time and learn about myself; what I like and dislike, what I want and what I don’t want in my life and that I do matter.

We didn’t work out, but I’ll never settle for anything less than what I deserve.

37 Reasons I’m the Best Girlfriend You’ll Ever Have

Best Girlfriend Award…

I’m not perfect, by any means, but I’m definitely a catch you should never pass up. If these 37 reasons why I’m probably the best girlfriend you’ll ever have, then you’re stupid.

I have a great sense of humor.
I’m clumsy, so I’m a good source of entertainment.
And I’m loving.
I’m a pretty great cook.
I promise (to try) not to poison you.
I’m a great listener.
No one will try to steal me from you.
And if they do I’ll shut them down in a hot second.
I’m a great cuddler.
I’m always honest.
I promise not to use your back to warm my feet.
I’ll pretend you didn’t look at the girl with huge boobs…
If you pretend I didn’t either.
I’ll take care of you when you’re sick.
I can pump my own gas.
And I give kick ass back rubs.
I won’t complain when you play with my hair and pull on a knot.
The only drama I’m any part of is what’s on my T.V.
I’ll always (eh, sometimes) have smooth legs.
We don’t have to watch chick flicks.
I’ll always smell good.
I can be ready in less than 20 minutes.
I’ll look cute in your shirts.
My hand fits perfectly with yours.
We get along great.
We have a lot in common.
Both of our families are dysfunctional.
I know the difference between there, their, and they’re.
And I promise not to hog all of the blankets.
I don’t snore.
I’m affectionate.
I’ll let you touch my butt in public.
I’ll let you pick the restaurant, but I’ll always tell you if there’s somewhere specific I want to go.
I can find Waldo faster than anybody else.
I’m not totally hideous.
I’ve finally overcome a long-lasting desire be a cat lady for the rest of my life.
You’ll never have to wonder how I feel about you.

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This Is What Being 'Friends with Benefits' Means to Me

I want to be something with you over nothing, but this in-between is killing me. I hate to admit it because I really don’t know if it’s mutual, but I’m falling for you. And I’m okay with being your friend with benefits, but this is what it really means to me.

Because I know you’re not looking to be in a relationship with anyone right now, but I can’t help but wonder… is it that you don’t want a relationship at all or just not one with me?

It means watching you smile and laugh and feeling a smile form on my face because it makes me happy knowing you’re happy.

It means listening to your stories about your family, your job, that annoying co-worker, anything and everything because I love learning more about you.

It means sitting on the couch watching tv feeling completely comfortable with each other because we’ve literally seen it all.

I'm happier now than I have been in such a long time and honestly, it’s because you’re in my life… in one way or another.

I’ve always been the girl who loves too hard or feels nothing at all, and now being your friend with benefits it means I have to bottle it up because I’m leaning more towards loving too hard…

I enjoy what we have, so much, but I know this means it might not be forever. It means that when I think about my future, when I think about the children I’ve always dreamt of having, and the home I want to make with someone, there is no guarantee that ‘someone’ will be you.

It means the commitment, consistency, loyalty, and honesty– the standards I’ve always held close to my heart in regards to a relationship, doesn’t really pertain to us.

We’re not in a relationship, we’re friends with benefits and to me, that means loopholes. That means an easy way out, that means nothing serious, that means no hard feelings… But it also could mean I’m going to get my heart broken and that terrifies me.

I don’t want to waste my time, but you mean a lot to me and I’m not ready to give up what we have yet.

I need you to know how I truly feel and I need to know if, maybe just maybe, you’re feeling the same.

I don’t want to just be what we are now forever – I want to eventually be more. Can’t you see it in the way I look at you? Can’t you feel it in my touch and when we kiss?

If there’s no chance of us ever being anything more than we are now, please just let me know.

I have to know if there’s a chance or no chance at all. I need to know if I have to guard my heart more or if eventually, I’ll be able to take my guard down.

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A Brutally Honest Letter to My Ex.

Dear Ex,

But I loved you anyways. We had good times and had a great connection. Or, I thought we did. Even though I loved you, you chose to break my heart and almost break my spirit.

There are so many times when I look back on our relationship and want to punch myself in the face for staying with you as long as I did. I don’t look back and think of all of our “wonderful” times, because they’re only plagued with horrible times right after. Things between us never stayed good for long.

I was never a hard woman to please. All I wanted was for you to give me love, affection, honesty, to be loyal and for me to be able to trust you. But you’re not that kind of person. You liked the attention and affection from other women. In the end, I’m glad we aren’t together. I do, however, want to thank you. You changed me forever, and honestly, I do want to thank you for that. You helped me realize that I’m a wonderful person with so much to offer myself, and eventually someone else.

I deserve someone who respects me, who is honest with me, who cares about me and my family, who is loyal and committed to me. Someone who is genuinely interested in me, that wants to spend time with me, who appreciates what I have to offer and someone that will love me unconditionally.

Since moving on from you, things in my life are so much better and I’m SO much happier. Thank you for trying to break me, but failing to do so. Because of that, I have found myself and love myself.

PS. Fuck you.

PPS. I hope karma fucks you in the ass with a cactus.

Sincerely,

The ex-girlfriend. ????