What Message Your Valentine’s Gift is Sending

Valentine’s Day. Yet another holiday that affords us an opportunity to express our deepest feelings to whom we most love. If there ever was a time when we read into a gift, it must be on St. Valentine’s Day. St. Valentine himself was credited with marrying Roman soldiers on the sly against the decree of the law. Risking one’s life to perform a marriage ceremony (and to be the ones taking part in it) has to be the grandest gesture of all.

Kind of makes that heart shaped cardboard box of chocolates you picked up in line in the drug store look a little less…less.

To send the right kind of message, you need the right kind of gift. Depending on where you are in a relationship, Valentine’s Day gifts, and their appropriateness will vary. Here are 5 ideas of what to get, and what you might be saying…

Artisan Jewelry

This is a good one. Anything you purchase on Etsy can be a win-win gift. Having a personal piece of jewelry made speaks volumes; love and affection aside, it’s thoughtful and sweet. Depending on your budget (and the level of commitment) you can find lovely sterling silver bracelets for a song all the way up to a hand forged diamond ring with your fingerprints. What message is it sending? “I really care about you. I want a special, personal gift you will wear close to your heart. I want to take the extra trouble to create something that’s special and one of a kind, just like you are to me.”

Pajamas:

There are pajamas, and then there’s “pajamas.” Flannel teddy bears with hearts may be a good gift for the beginning of a relationship. They’re sweet, and a little bit suggestive. You might be sending a better message with these than cliché lingerie set. What message are they sending? “I love your funny side. I think it’s sexy.”

Chocolates:

Yes, yes, I read the introductory paragraph….I wrote it! I’m talking chocolates that are hand made. Again, use your magical Internet fairy and find chocolates in crazy flavors that are his or her favorite. There’s a bevy of chocolate and wine pairings. Salted, caramel, hot pepper, and cheese…there’s a taste for everyone. What kind of a message do these send? “I pay attention to small details about you. I know how you take your coffee. I know what you like on your pizza. I like being the person that notices these things and acts on them to make you smile.”

Poetry:

I’m serious. A beautiful edition of Sonnets from the Portuguese by Elizabeth Barrett Browning or Shakespeare’s Sonnets speaks…wait for it, volumes. Write a little sentiment inside that says something along the lines of, “This may just begin to cover how I feel…” That’s a good message.

Stuffed Animals:

Please. Raise your right hand right now. (Unless you are a sixteen-year-old boy with a paper route.) Repeat after me: “I (state your name) will not buy a stuffed animal that has a ribbon, flag or t-shirt on that says Happy Valentine’s Day.” Good. Now, that being said, you can find a sweetly sentimental little friend for your valentine. Again, go artisan. Find a small felted wool figurine, or a teeny, tiny hand jointed teddy bear. You want something grown up. If you go small, it can live in his or her bag, on the computer at work or perched on a nightstand. We truly never outgrow our affinity for little toys. Trust me. I carry a tiny little dog with me in my tote bag every day. Don’t judge. It sends a good message.

40 Signs That Labor Day is Almost Here

Follow these signs and you’ll be enjoying an exciting Labor Day weekend in no time:

  1. The leaves are really turning red, it’s not just a dead branch stuck up there.

  2. The Halloween candy is already picked over in the grocery store.

  3. Back to School supplies are on clearance.

  4. You can’t get a reservation at the lake; they’re booked.

  5. People are stocking up on Hershey bars, marshmallows and graham crackers.

  6. No one is using the pool.

  7. You’ve given up on your flowerpots.

  8. The dog is shedding ferociously.

  9. You took your window air conditioner out.

  10. Thanksgiving decorations are already in the drug stores.

  11. The catalogs are already stressing you out about Christmas.

  12. You finally found the perfect pair of white shorts, but you can’t wear them now.

  13. The NYS thruway is peppered with overloaded cars with university stickers.

  14. The school buses are doing their dry runs.

  15. Guidance counselors are hiding under their desks because of the barrage of parents.

  16. You haven’t uncovered the lawn furniture in a week.

  17. It’s dark already at 8:00.

  18. You need a jacket to go out to dinner.

  19. Starbucks is featuring their Pumpkin Spice Latte.

  20. Ice cream stands are out of your favorite flavor.

  21. Radio stations are doing “end of summer” mixes.

  22. The cooking shows are featuring oven dinners.

  23. Your favorite brewery is featuring the winter brews.

  24. Everyone is wearing boots again.

  25. You feel stressed that you haven’t taken the boat out “one last time.”

  26. Your hallway is laden with paraphernalia for a dorm room.

  27. You’re switching from light fruity drinks to dark, dry, red wine.

  28. The soccer coach has already called with the fall schedule.

  29. You’ve received a list of items to buy from your child’s teacher.

  30. It’s almost the playoffs in baseball.

  31. You find yourself making hot tea.

  32. The thunderstorms are furious.

  33. It’s really hurricane season.

  34. You’ve given up on achieving your bikini body for this year.

  35. You brought your sweaters to the dry cleaners.

  36. The florists are featuring mums.

  37. The apple stands are open.

  38. Suddenly, you’re craving homemade maple syrup.

  39. You feel an intrinsic urge to buy new pens.

  40. You got the school calendar.

25 Reasons Why Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte Is So Irresistible

The upside of the end of summer is the fact that it’s officially Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte Season. Yay! There are so many reasons why it’s so irresistible. While I won’t break into song, I will share some of the best ones with you.

  1. Standing in line with all those other coffee patrons, you know yours smells the best.

  2. Everyone knows that cinnamon is magic. Look it up.

  3. The froth on the top looks like heavy dew on fall mornings.

  4. The spicy flavor that stays on your tongue even after you’re finished.

  5. That very first sip of the season is something special.

  6. The cup even has fall decorations on it.

  7. It’s the perfect cozy drink with a sweater.

  8. It makes their pound cake even more decadent.

  9. The whipped cream melts just a little bit so you don’t need a spoon.

  10. It doesn’t even need added sugar. It’s already perfect.

  11. The smell of the pumpkin and clove is like perfume.

  12. Pumpkin is really healthy for you….

  13. It tastes better on a road trip.

  14. It feels like home no matter what Starbucks you get it from.

  15. If you drink it with a skinny straw, it will last longer.

  16. It doesn’t matter if you drink it too quickly, you can still get another.

  17. The season is just starting, there’s lots of rendezvous ahead.

  18. It’s perfect any time of day.

  19. It doesn’t make you hyper.

  20. But it doesn’t make you sleepy.

  21. You feel satisfied when you finish it…

  22. But just a little sad.

  23. It’s richer than regular coffee.

  24. It’s a bedtime story in a cup.

  25. They are always perfect. Every. Time.

20 Signs You’ll Never Be Over Your Love of Starbucks 

All Time Best Characters In Christmas Movies

Christmas is that time of year when we see the people we love the most.  We’re thrilled and elated to be reunited with them for that brief tenure over holiday break.  I’m not talking about anybody’s weird aunt or moody in-laws.  I am referring to those beloved characters we invite into our homes every year to celebrate the holidays with us.  Who, you may ask would be on this guest list?  Well, it’s funny you should ask…because all of them are fictional characters.

1. Clark Griswold Does anyone not think of their dear ole Uncle Clark as they wrestle in the front yard with the Christmas lights and froth themselves into a stupor over a dead power strip?  Have you ever said, “I dedicate this to the Griswold Family Christmas?”  Poor Sparky.   Christmas just wouldn’t be Christmas without Clark.

“Is your house on fire, Clark?”

“No Aunt Bethany, those are the Christmas lights.”


2. Ralphie Ralphie transcends Christmas-time. I use the line, “I triple dog dare you” at least twice a week all through the year. Ralphie embodies for all of us those years of Christmas when we were filled with wonder and belief and those four weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas were the longest days of the year. In fact how many of you have a rendition of The Leg Lamp, A.K.A. as  “the soft glow of electric sex gleaming in the window.” I laugh every time I see it on the set of PTI.


3. Old Man Parker You probably don’t recognize his name from the cast, but if I said “Ralphie’s father” you would probably answer me with, “Not a finger!!” or “Sons of bitch Bumpuses!!” or the Queen Mother of them all, “Fra-GEEL-eh. It must be Italian.”  Nothing says True Christmas Spirit like the line, “My father worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay. It was his true medium. A master.”  Well, except for maybe, “Shut up, Ralphie!”  That screams of Christmas love and happiness as well.


4. Herbie Whether you’re a small child or a college kid playing some kind of a drinking game, “I wanna be a dentist!” means something to you. Go back and re-watch Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and be horrified that we were ever exposed to such politically incorrect media. See. We turned out all right.


5. Jessica. As in, Jessica Claus Who knew Mrs. Claus was such a hottie in her hey day? She was The Original muse for Van Halen’s “I’m Hot For Teacher.” When Kris Kringle gives her that china doll…swoon. “Oh well, I never had a china doll before.” That was as romantic as it could get when you were ten in your jammies watching “Santa Claus is Coming to Town.”


6. Buddy The Elf I’ll admit to answering the phone, “Buddy the Elf.  What’s your favorite color?” How can you not make room in your heart for this oversized child like elf? I still laugh my head off every time he eats those cotton balls. It’s even better watching this movie knowing that Sonny Corleone plays his father, Walter. James Caan. You’re killin’ me it’s so awesome. When he listens to Santa tell him NOT to eat the gum on the street and then he eats it anyway…classic. Who among us hasn’t at least once put syrup on something and said, “You like sugar, huh?  Is syrup sugar? Then YES!” Buddy is so popular that his Halloween costume sells out all the time. True story. When I teach a new vocabulary word to my students, I love to tell them, “That’s fun to say!!”


 

7. Cindy Lou Who Her part is almost as tiny as she is, but she totally steals the show away from the Grinch. I’m not just saying this because she’s my namesake. However, I will admit to silencing an entire room just so I can clearly hear, “Santy Claus. Why? Why are you stealing our Christmas Tree? Why?”


 

8. Snoopy Snoopy is America’s pet dog. If you re-watch “A Charlie Brown Christmas,” you’ll see the genius of the late great Charles Schultz in the antics of Snoopy. Without a single speaking line, (unless you consider those “Mmmwah!” noises he makes,) he manages to be the star of the show every time. Whether he’s carrying his bowl in his mouth, making his own Christmas decorations or sleeping on his doghouse, Snoopy wins Best of Show.


 

9. Scott Calvin You may know him as Santa Claus, but this was his given name before he became entangled in The Santa Clause. His wide-eyed wonderment, along with his entourage of elves and his son, Charlie, make all of us want to believe.


 

10. Susan from Miracle on 34th Street You see it once and you know that this The Classic American Christmas Film. We can’t help but like Susan (Mara Wilson) despite her skepticism. Her giggly relationship with Bryan, (played by Dylan McDermott) coupled by her sassy one with her mother, Dorey, (played by Elizabeth Perkins) makes the wonder of Santa Claus come alive every single time.

7 Unique Ideas for Graduation Gifts

It’s that special time of year when the invitations begin to inundate your mail.  Graduations, high school, college, even kindergarten, are a huge part of everyone’s spring social calendar. It can get expensive.  It can be overwhelming.  It can be difficult, especially if you’re invited to a party for your co-worker’s child (the one you’ve never met) or the if you get the invitation that I consider the granddaddy of them all…from one of your own students.  

While you want to mark the day and make said graduate feel special, if you have a “Graduation Party Crawl” for any given Saturday, it can add up quickly.  Here are some ideas for you to help share that special day.

1.  Laundry bags and soap:  Here’s a news flash for those of us who went to college when John Hughes movies were still relevant; they don’t have to pay to use the washing machines anymore.  They conveniently tacked this charge to the tuition.  While the students think it’s free, they still do, in fact, need to have supplies.  Tide pods are the preferred method of choice because they’re much easier to transport with all your filthy wardrobe possessions. You can just tuck one in your pocket.  You can find really cute laundry bags at Marshall’s and TJ Maxx and honestly, if you can give a gift they’ll use, it’s all the better.

2. Gift cards: $5.00 gift cards are perfectly acceptable for college kids.  Buy them in this increment from places like Starbucks, Fro-Yo, Subway, Dunkin’ Donuts etc.  That’s about all you spend to eat there.  Don’t give just one, but put a few into a card and it becomes the perfect gift.  (I’ll tell you honestly, they may end up being a trade off for a ride somewhere to a kid who has a car on campus, but that in itself serves a huge purpose.)

3. Toiletries:  Think pain relief, cough drops, Vick’s and a thermometer.  Their mothers will have to buy them anyway and it’s something you can put into a little plastic container for their closets.  With a card, and maybe a little “boo-boo bunny” it’s a thoughtful gift.  When flu season comes to roost on the 3 South dorm, those cough drops will be much appreciated…by everyone!

4. Snack foods:  ALL the kids on the floor appreciate when someone has snacks.  Look for nonperishable items like popcorn, crackers and peanut butter.  You want food that can handle being thrown around in a closet and not end up being a bag of potato dust.  Twenty dollars at the dollar store and you have well, obviously…

5. School and Dorm Supplies:  Colored pencils, markers, notebooks, you name it.  College kids are always looking for two sided tape and that weird sticky stuff like gum that holds even on cement block walls. Command strip hooks are a really great gift.  You can hang everything from Christmas lights, (that are NOT dorm approved) to a bathrobe with them. Cleaning supplies are also good as well.  Lysol wipes and Swiffers are in big demand because housekeeping does not have to clean their rooms.  If they’re living in a townhouse or a suite, they’ll need even more comprehensive cleaning supplies because then they’re in charge of their own bathrooms.  I know, gross.  You might want to throw in some flip-flops.  

6. Stationery supplies:  Even though most kids today don’t know how to address an envelope correctly, (I’m serious, ask them to do one,) they will still need this skill.  Buy a box of greeting cards for them, a package of thank you cards and some plain envelopes with paper.  Add a sheet of stamps as well.  As kids get more and more involved with professors and community internships, they’ll need to have paper to correspond the old-fashioned way.  The greeting cards are a nice touch so they can stay connected with people at home as well.  Depending on how well you know the student and his or her family, you can tuck in a sheet with addresses and a list of birthdays for them to remember.  

7. A copy of something by William Shakespeare.  Beautiful looking copies of Shakespeare’s plays are featured all over the place in bookstores today.  A copy of Hamlet is something you’ll keep forever.  No one should have a bookshelf of any kind without a copy of something by The Bard. I think it’s a law in a some European countries.  (I’m kidding.)   It’s a nice keepsake and it’s a reminder that learning is a life long journey. 

Why It's Better To Have A Dog Instead Of A Boyfriend

I want to make a disclaimer right off the bat.  This article is for fun.  There’s no deep seeded man hating going on here.  That being said, I would like to point out, when people say, “All men are dogs” they are entirely incorrect.  If all men were dogs wouldn’t they all be loyal, affectionate and willing to be put on a leash?  Just sayin’.

Everyone wants someone to love and to love them back.  It’s in our nature, but I am willing to publicly suggest that perhaps it’s better to have a dog than a boyfriend.  Here are some reasons why.

  1. While it’s generally frowned upon if your boyfriend sticks his face into other people’s crotches, with dogs, it’s expected and entirely accepted behavior.
  2. A dog will never forget how to find his way home.
  3. A dog will wait patiently by the door for you to come home.
  4. While a boyfriend won’t even put the seat down, a dog is willing to drink from the john wherever the lid may be.
  5. A dog doesn’t make faces when you want to binge on chick flicks and sweet wine from a box.
  6. A dog is happy when your mother comes to visit and doesn’t mind when she rubs his belly.
  7. A dog doesn’t steal the covers, and if he does, he’s cute about it.
  8. A dog doesn’t complain about the meal.  In fact, he’s willing to eat it off the floor.
  9. A dog will literally drool over you.  Try it.  Lay on the floor and let your dog climb on your chest.  Have you ever had a man literally drooling over you?  Didn’t think so.
  10. A dog doesn’t complain about your driving skills.  He’s just happy if you let him sit in the front seat and stick his face out the window.
  11. A dog is literally willing (and able) to kiss the ground you walk on. 
  12. A dog likes shoes as much as you do…that’s not always the case with boyfriends.
  13. A dog is a true barometer of people.  Boyfriends can sometimes have alterior motives.  If my dog doesn’t like you than neither should I.
  14. A dog isn’t jealous is you spend the evening talking to someone else.  He’s happy to lay at your feet.  
  15.   A dog will speak, sit and lay down on command. 
  16.   It’s all right if your dog wants to lay on the couch with his head in your best friend’s lap.  Not so much for a boyfriend.
  17. A dog is never afraid to admit he’s really afraid of thunderstorms.
  18. ….and fireworks.
  19. A dog jumps into everything head first.  He lives for the moment, he doesn’t second guess his actions and he’s not afraid of looking silly.
  20. A dog doesn’t judge you for eating the whole pizza.  

Greatest. Movie Lines. Ever.

They say that life imitates art. Or is it the other way around and art imitates life? I can never get that straight.

I do know that we as a culture love our movies. Whether it’s the plot, or the people playing the roles, there’s a draw we can’t resist. One sign that a movie is particularly important is when people start using lines from it in their day-to-day conversations. Here’s a list of some of the best lines from movies. Please add your favorites in the comments!

  1. “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.” Gone With The Wind
  2. “Flowers. Oh. How ‘ordinarwy’.” Blazing Saddles
  3. “Mama always said, ‘Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.’” Forrest Gump
  4. “I have a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore.” Wizard of Oz
  5. “You talkin’ to me?” Taxi Driver
  6. “Show me the money!” Jerry Maguire
  7. “I’ll have what she’s having.” When Harry Met Sally
  8. “I’ll be back.” The Terminator
  9. “May the force be with you.” Star Wars
  10. “Say hello to my little friend.” Scar Face
  11. “I’m in love with you.” “Snap out of it!!” Moonstruck
  12. “Round up the usual suspects.” Casablanca
  13. “Houston, we have a problem.” Apollo 13
  14. “There’s no crying in baseball!” A League of Their Own
  15. “You’re killin’ me, Smalls.” The Sandlot
  16. “My precious.” Lord of The Rings: Two Towers
  17. “Nobody puts Baby in a corner.” Dirty Dancing
  18. “I’m king of the world!!” Titanic
  19. “Adrian!!!!” Rocky
  20. “You had me at ‘hello.’” Jerry Macguire
  21. “Oh, shut your face.” Love Actually
  22. “What is the wide, wide, world of sports is a goin’ on here?” Blazing Saddles
  23. “Here’s lookin’ at you, kid.” Casablanca
  24. “I see dead people.” The Sixth Sense
  25. “I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse.” The Godfather
  26. “You’re gonna need a bigger boat.” Jaws
  27. “If you build it, he will come.” Field of Dreams
  28. “Do you feel lucky, punk?” Dirty Harry
  29. “Martini. Shaken not stirred.” James Bond
  30. “And now I know for sure, I just added two new guys to my wolf pack.” The Hangover
  31. “I gave her my heart. She gave me a pen.” Say Anything
  32. “Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.” The Princess Bride
  33. “If you ain’t first, you’re last.” Talladega Nights: The Legend of Ricky Bobby
  34. “I know it was you, Fredo. You broke my heart.” The Godfather Part II
  35. “Tina you fat lard, come get some dinner!” Napoleon Dynamite
  36. “I’m just one stomach flu away from my goal weight.” The Devil Wears Prada
  37. “Fish are friends, not food!” Finding Nemo
  38. “Surely you can’t be serious.” “I am serious…and don’t call me Shirley.” Airplane
  39. “They’re not gonna catch us. We’re on a mission from God.” The Blues Brothers
  40. “Anyone? Anyone?” Ferris Bueller
  41. “Vote for Pedro.” Napoleon Dynamite
  42. “Just when I think you couldn’t possibly be any dumber, you go and do something like this…and totally redeem yourself.” Dumb and Dumber
  43. “I love scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch. Here it goes down into my belly.” Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
  44. “I love lamp.” Brick- Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
  45. “You don’t smell like Santa. You smell like beef and cheese.” Elf
  46. “I triple dog dare you.” A Christmas Story
  47. “Not a finger!” A Christmas Story. (Again.)
  48. “Fragile…it must be Italian.” (Third time’s the charm.) A Christmas Story
  49. “Sheets. Who invited that kid?” Toy Story
  50. “Go ahead. Make my day.” Sudden Impact

How To Deal With The Constant Office Collections

Well first off, congratulations! You are gainfully employed. Having a job brings with it a plethora of social situations that may be completely foreign to you, especially if you’re fresh out of school. There’s an unspoken culture within every workplace. You’ll meet your share of characters.

Working with other people brings with it certain expectations; you need to be a professional, you need to be part of the team, you need to keep your nose clean and you need to be engaged on some level with your co-workers. People distrust loners that never interact on a personal level. It’s just part of the game.

It’s intimidating when you first start working and someone brings you a card and asks you to sign and put some money in the for the donation. How much? Do you ask? Is that tacky? You want to be friendly, but what are you supposed to do when you 1: don’t know the person and 2: you don’t have the disposable cash to keep dropping in the proverbial bucket. Depending on the size of the company you work for, you could have five or six cards rotating at any given time.

When you sign the card, you’re expected to chip in for the collection. If you feel comfortable you can ask what they will do with the money. You can say something like, “What is a ball park amount everyone is doing because I was planning on doing something myself.” This sentence lets you put your feelers out and you also have an out if it’s more than you can do. The only thing worse than being the person who doesn’t donate is being the jerk who puts in two dollars when everyone else put in twenty. (They always sign their name the biggest too…) Let me repeat this. Don’t be that jerk. Why? Well, the old lady that handed you the card already knows how much money is in there. Don’t think for a minute she isn’t going to count how much you added. Just sayin’. I’ve got your interests here. I know those nosy card collectors. (Sometimes, I’m one of them.) Jk. 

Trust me, I know how awkward it is. It seems like everyone else around you has money for this stuff and you don’t. This is why you should buy your own cards. You can buy a box of cards for next to nothing. Keep a set of all occasion greeting cards in your desk. When you’re approached to give for a donation you can truthfully say to them, “Oh I did my own card.” No one will balk. No one will care. The next step is that you have to actually do your own card. I can help you there as well.

Depending on how well you know the person a card may honestly be enough. If you give a head nod in the morning and you don’t eat lunch together, a card with a sincere note is enough. If you are friendly with someone, write out the card and buy a small token that you can afford…a coffee gift card, a small plant, a little toy for a new baby, whatever. You aren’t ignoring them and you’re doing what you can legitimately can do while not destroying your own budget.

Office politics will never go away. As humans, we are wired to create communities within communities. Make it easier on yourself and always be part of the group.

35 Signs You Are So Over Winter

While winter is about three months long in calendar days, the same as any other season, it seems to spread itself out on both ends.

While in early December that first special Christmas snow may make us feel all warm and cozy inside, by the third week of March we have had enough. Here are some clues that you have had your fill of Old Man Winter.

  1. You put the catalogs featuring sweaters on the cover directly into the recycling bin.
  2. You splurged on a pedicure because you’re tired of having reptile feet. You don’t care no one else can see it.
  3. When you surf the Internet, you find yourself stopping on the crystal clear beaches that are popping up on your screen.
  4. You’ve started naming the storms yourself instead of waiting for The Weather Channel to do it. None of them are appropriate to list here.
  5. You’ve given up on your car. It’s filthy in and out and you can’t keep up.
  6. The salt on your boots is so stained into the leather that you’ve stopped cleaning it.
  7. You’re embracing that spare tire of yours that you’ve let inflate since the second week of January.
  8. You gave up all your New Year’s Resolutions because you’re in a pit of despair and you don’t see the point.
  9. Your habit of an occasional scotch and soda is now your nightly ritual. Twice.
  10. You can’t find your gym bag.
  11. Your sneakers are frozen in the trunk of you car.
  12. Cream cheese is in almost every meal you eat.
  13. You’ve grown used to that mossy wet feeling you get on the bottom of your feet after you’ve walked through the slush.
  14. You have a stash of shoes under your desk because you’re tired of packing them up every night.
  15. You’ve moved to the next larger size coffee….
  16. …And perhaps jeans size as well.
  17. With the end of the football season you find yourself mindlessly watching cheerleading competitions on television.
  18. You’ve exhausted all the episodes of your Netflix obsession.
  19. You find nothing wrong with wearing your bathrobe over your work clothes. At 6:00 p.m.
  20. You are late every morning because you can’t get yourself out of bed even after pushing the snooze three times.
  21. You find yourself pulling your hat down almost over your eyes on the subway because you want to be alone when you weep.
  22. You’re watching re-runs of re-runs.
  23. You find yourself going to bed earlier every night, but waking up even more exhausted the next day.
  24. You think you couldn’t possibly go out at this crazy hour of the night only to release it’s 7:30.
  25. You wish your dog knew how to use the toilet. You’ve told him so on more than one occasion.
  26. The rug in your front hall way is so dirty you forgot what color it was.
  27. You don’t see anything wrong with wearing velour pants to work.
  28. You say bad words when you hear the heat kick on again.
  29. You had a cache of food to be ready for the next apocalyptic snow storm, but you ate it. All of it.
  30. You really don’t care if the mailman said he won’t deliver your mail if you don’t shovel your walk.
  31. You’ve grown used to driving with your shoulders up in your ears because you didn’t let the car warm up.
  32. You aren’t afraid to drive in the snow anymore. This is not a good thing. Just because you aren’t afraid of it doesn’t make you good at it.
  33. You’ve trolled on real estate sites for homes in warmer climates.
  34. You’re excited to visit your grandparents in their gated community. In Florida.
  35. You wake up every morning and check your phone for a snow day or a two-hour delay or a travel advisory. Anything. Anything at all.

8 Ways Greek Mythology is Used in Your Every Day Life

As public education gets further and further desecrated by Common Core, one of the things that is falling to the wayside is Greek Mythology. While, perhaps at first thought, people may think that it’s an antiquated and irrelevant unit that was normally covered in 9th grade English curriculum, I urge you to think again.

The classroom definition of literary allusion is, “A reference, implied or indirect, to another person, event or circumstance within another text.??? In layman’s terms, this simply means mentioning one work of literature in another. The rub lies in that in order to understand the literary allusion, one must be exposed to the original source of which one alluded. Two major sources of literary allusion are The Holy Bible and Greek Mythology. In order for today’s youngsters to fully comprehend some of the world’s best literature it is imperative that they are exposed to these sources, if only for literary gain.

This list is just a small compilation of allusions we use every day that are traced back to the ancient Greek myths.

  1. Oedipus: Sigmund Freud is credited with coining the phrase, “The Oedipus Complex.??? Oedipus Rex, the king who fulfills the oracle’s prophecy and kills his father and marries his mother is not only an engaging Greek tragedy, but also a developmental phase recognized in young boys. However endearing it is to hear a tiny tot say, “I love Mommy. I want to marry her,??? It holds more credence when you know the source.
  2. King Midas: The Midas touch…everything he touches turns to gold. The king begged the gods for this gift, until it backfired and he turned his little daughter into a gold statue.
  3. The FTD logo: Everyone knows the dashing gold man that peppers flower commercials. Did you know that he’s Hermes? He’s the god of messengers.
  4. Narcissus: To be called a “Narcissist??? means to be in love with yourself. We know that. Did you know the word comes from Narcissus? He was an extremely handsome huntsman and that upon seeing his own reflection in a pool of water he was unable to pull himself away. He drowned and his downfall was being so in love with himself that he ignored everything else.
  5. Nike: Yes, we know it as an icon in itself for sports. It comes from the Greek sprite, Nike. She was the winged goddess of victory in battle.
  6. Pandora: The music, the jewelry, both of them hold symbolism in opening the box, releasing all of the evil in the world and being left with hope. In fact, Pandora’s name in Greek mythology means, “all gifted.???
  7. The Days of the Week: Monday, Moon day (Lunedi in Italian.) Monday is named for the goddess of the moon. (So was I. It’s Cynthia.) Tuesday is named for the god of war, Mars. (Mardi, Martedi, Tuesday.) Wednesday is named for the god, Mercury. The word for Wednesday in Italian is Mercoledi.) Thursday is really Thor’s Day. The god of thunder. Friday is named for the Goddess of Love. Aphrodite’s Roman name is Venus. Venerdi is the Italian name for Friday. Incidentally, that’s why we call them “Venereal??? Disease…Saturday is named for Saturn. Saturn was the father of Zeus.
  8. Chronos is the god of time. We use the word “chronological??? every day to describe things in “time order.???

Kudos to you as well if you’ve noticed that the days of the week are also, (no pun intended) in alignment with the planets. While you’re up there, notice the stars. Orion, Cassiopeia, and Andromeda to name just a few…

And an additional kudos if you recognize that kudos is a Greek word attributed to being used for the first time in The Iliad.

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