It's that crazy time of year again, the sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and the feels are out to get you. If you stay sneezing throughout all of cuffing season, you might have a very serious allergy. 

1. When someone asks you on a date and your first reaction is "LOL are you serious? People still go on dates?"

2. You can’t sit through romance movies without rolling your eyes or calling bullsh*t 

3. The moment someone shows you unanticipated affection you either flinch or square up.

4. It’s been a while since your last crush, your too busy not caring to care.

5. You can’t remember the last time you said I love you to anyone besides your parents or the occasional passing dog.

6. Seeing PDA makes you nauseous and you can't help think in your head (and sometimes out loud) GET A ROOM.

7. You’re not the best at comforting people and when you try, it’s just awkward AF.

8. You immediately change the channel when an ASPCA commercial comes on. Too many feels. 

9. You prefer being single to being in a relationship because there's no one to have to share food with.

10. You can’t help but scowl in sentimental situations, just to offset the emotions.

11. April Ludgate from Parks and Rec is your spirit animal.

12. When people get drunk and start professing their feelings, you have an arsenal of excuses ready so you can dip out ASAP.

13. You definitely follow your head more than your heart.

14. Expressing yourself on the rare occasion that you want to is difficult.

15. You’ve definitely been accused of not having a soul, but you know that’s not true! You have one of course, it just happens to repel mushy sappiness.

Oscar Wilde once said “never love someone who treats you like you’re ordinary.??? I couldn’t agree more.

The person who treats you like you’re ordinary fails to treasure the traits that make you most unique; that are specific to you. Your vulnerability may be seen as weakness or your sense of humor seen as immature.

They will roll their eyes when you say something silly or ask you to be more “ladylike.??? Because you’re not exactly predictable, they will try to censor, judge, or condemn your shamelessness.

Perhaps they once appreciated who you are, but something within them can no longer keep up with you or wishes you’d be more standard or conventional.

When you’re being treated as ordinary, you may begin to stray away from your best sense of self, as it’s being denounced or even ignored, and the pursuit of your own personality will feel wrong.

But the person who doesn’t treat you as such will acknowledge the craziest, most peculiar aspects of who you are and even enhance those facets.

You will constantly be challenged to be anything but ordinary with them; they will be on par with your spontaneity and sense of adventure.

When you’re not conforming to what is ordinary, you will end up taking more risks—and will have their support for the entire journey.

When you’re not walking down a conventional and safe path, you will feel freer than ever before and your wildest dreams will seem both valid and possible.

With the person who treats you as extraordinary, you will feel limitless and liberated.

So, don’t settle for the person who wants you to be normal. 

Be with someone who complements your crazy.

For a considerable amount of time, I enjoyed your company, immersed in the comfort that our connection created.

This didn’t appear to be an almost-relationship, as we both put forth equal investment into one another. As that investment grew stronger and deeper, there didn’t seem to be an end in sight—so I looked to the future.

I saw our travels to vibrant places, celebratory dinners for two, and quiet nights indoors with Chinese food. We would see the world around us while enjoying the one that we shared together.

Some of these plans were mutually vocalized as others remained internalized, but one thing seemed for certain: that we would be moving forward as a pair.

It wasn’t until you began executing large-scale plans that didn’t involve me that I realized that we weren’t as in-sync as I had believed.

We were still a part of each other, but the path in front of us didn’t appear to be a single road.

As I reevaluated my individual future, I knew that I had been losing sight of myself because I was wrapped up in the possibility of us.

While you appeared to be full of promise, I wasn’t going to wait for you to make one to me. So I left.

I left because you never asked me to stay; I left because our future plans became a fantasy that was past tense.

I chose myself and my path, rather than seeing it as ours. I remembered that we are—and always were—two people, not one.

I also realized that when I parted from you, I wasn’t less of a person without you. I was still a whole person…with my own plans.

In essence, it was when I left your life that I reclaimed my own.

This girl loves differently than any other because she knows exactly who she is. She's never questioned her 'true self' because she's always been the strong, ambitious girl since day 1.

1. She needs some control in every situation or she'll lose her shit.

Surprises? No. Spontaneous ideas that she had no part in planning? Hard no.  

When she's comfortable with someone she'll let go (a little) but that won't happen over night. The good thing is she's the most reliable and dependable person you'll ever meet. 

2. If someone called her a follower she'd laugh in their face.

Because she’s deadline-driven, competitive, and organized, she's the one who delegates tasks to a team of people. If you go on a group road trip, expect her to have an itinerary planned ahead of time—mostly because she doesn’t trust anyone else to do so.

3. She shoots for the moon and won't settle for landing among the stars.

Her sense of motivation and drive is insane. This girl is her own biggest critic and won’t settle for a half-assed job. 

And when it comes to your relationship she'll make it the best she possibly can, give you her all every single day. 

4. Going to bed mad doesn't fly with her.

If there's something up between the two of you, she wants to solve it ASAP. She will be up at 3 am arguing till she's red in the face and her eyes can't even cry anymore.

But only because she cares so much about your relationship that she's willing to stay up and fight it out till you make up.

5. She doesn’t take ‘no’ very lightly… but she's trying.

She knows exactly what she wants in life if someone tells her she can’t do something, it makes her want to do it even more. She loves a good challenge, especially if it means proving someone wrong. 

But to her, you're the most important thing in her life, so she's willing to take a chill pill once in a while. But not every day… obviously. 

6. She's going to try and fix you, but only with your best interests at heart.

She’s made plenty of mistakes herself and doesn’t want to see you make the same ones. If you’re about to take a risk, she will surely be the one to point out every caveat. 

With her guidance, you’ll never wonder if you’re making the wrong decision.

7. Feeling needed > everything.

This goes for the both of you. She wants you to make her feel like she's the reason you wake up in the morning because she'd never let you go a day without feeling that. 

8. Your sex life will never be the same.

If there’s something you’re not doing, she will literally lead your hand (or face) where she wants it to go. There will be no passiveness between the sheets because she’s giving her best performance and will want the same from you. 

You’ll have plenty of moves to thank her for in the future.

Sure, we’re pretty sensitive, but we have good intentions:

1. We’ll always listen to you when you need to vent…

2. And will offer endless empathy.

3. We will tap into our keen intuition when giving you advice or guidance.

4. When you demonstrate your loyalty and vulnerability to us…

5. It will NOT go unnoticed, and will be reciprocated to the fullest.

6. Since we’re adaptable…

7. We can easily mold to your current mood.

8. Our unpredictability will definitely keep you on your toes.

9. We’re very in touch with our sensitive sides…

10. So we can easily tell when something is wrong with you.

11. (And we’ll do our best to make your life a little easier.)

12. We love to feel needed.

13. Sure, we can be a bit moody at times.

14. On really bad days, we might look to you to put a smile on our faces.

15. (Only because we would absolutely do the same for you.)

16. We love being comforted by our S/O when the going gets tough.

17. And we are eternally grateful for your support when it comes to work/school.

18. We have a hard outer shell, but a soft center.

19. So, there’s a lot of mystery to us.

20. We will always push you to be more passionate and persistent in life.

21. Our memory is incredibly vivid, so we won’t forget any special dates.

22. (Or your favorite grocery items.)

23. Yes, we’re pretty tender people…

24. And tend to let our emotions get the best of us…

25. But it’s only because we’re invested in every bit of you.

Sure she’s cray and is the queen of doing all things stupid, but you wouldn’t be the same without her.

1. She’s changed everything about you in the best way.

2. She’s taught you how to live on the edge.

3. Her sense of independence has inspired you to be your own person.

4. Her recklessness has taught you about your own personal boundaries.

5. And you’ve become more open-minded…

6. Because she’s given you no other option.

7. And sure, some might call her a bad influence…

8. But you know she would never let you get out of line.

9. Even though she’s gotten you into plenty of trouble with your parents…

10. You wouldn’t trade those experiences for anything—regardless of the punishment.

11. Because these crazy experiences are what’ll help you grow the most in life. 

12. This girl has been through some shit…

13. But gives the best advice because of it.

14. She’s made plenty of mistakes…

15. And would never let you make the same ones.

16. She’s protective AF.

17. …And no one will fuck with you when she’s around.

18. You always know who to call when you’re looking to have fun.

19. She’s hands-down the best wing woman EVER.

20. …And you’ve likely gotten some because of her skills.

21. Passing judgment is not her style.

22. Sometimes she tells you what you don’t want to hear.

23. …But need to acknowledge.

24. She’s the first person to confront your cheating ex.

25. (Or any guy who’s being a douchelord to you.)

26. Her friendship is always challenging you to do something new…

27. Or to be a better version of yourself…

28. And you’re so thankful to have her crazy ass in your life.

29. Because without her, your life would be too vanilla. 

After countless unflattering Snapchat selfies of you and your several chins followed by equally unflattering graphic text messages, it’s become clear to me that your quest to get between my legs is a relentless one.

While we flirted for a short time one evening, leading to an exchange of phone numbers, the next call to action wasn’t clear. But I certainly didn’t expect what came next.

Despite the fact that you barely know me, you somehow think it’s perfectly appropriate to ask for sex… over and over and over again.

So, any good vibes I felt towards you were soiled the moment your efforts and intentions became strictly sexual. Each request has left me scratching my damn head, wondering what led you to believe I was so apt to have sex with you so soon after meeting for the first time.

Like, really?

I mean— there was literally not a single coffee date or “let’s meet for a drink" date before you went for the full Monty.

Although I’ve ignored every advance you’ve tried to make, you continue to send messages saying “let’s fuck" or “I want to fuck you." You’ve also accused me of “teasing" you, even though I haven’t been in contact with you for months now.

Ok…?

Which leads me to say: your constant chase in the form of post-3 a.m. texts is not flattering or appealing—it’s just a nuisance.

For some odd reason, you must still be under the impression that I might still actually have sex with you, even after disregarding every single one of your perverse invitations. 

You making this assumption about someone you know little-to-nothing about is straight up pretentious and speaks volumes about your character (or lack thereof).

The fact that you have only expressed interest in my body and not anything else I have to offer is insulting to me and everything I have worked for to date.

By allowing someone so impudent to have access to a single inch of my being would be the ultimate form of self-disrespect.

So, simply put, my answer is and always will be no.

Now, sashay away, fuckboy.

There’s a little Beyonce inside all of us, we just have to wake up every day and slay to find it. 

1. “She’s a badass with a good heart, soft but strong. Unapologetic and honest. She’s the type of woman you go to war beside—the type of woman you marry.” – Rh Sin

2. “I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life’s a bitch. You’ve got to go out and kick ass.” – Maya Angelou

3. “A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.” – Gloria Steinem

4. “I am a woman with thoughts and questions and shit to say. I say if I’m beautiful. I say if I’m strong. You will not determine my story—I will.” – Amy Schumer

5. “If I could offer any advice, it would be: Be your own shrink and ask yourself tough questions like, ‘Why am I doing this? Where do I want to be? And of course…what would I do if I weren’t afraid?’ And then be brutally honest with yourself, even if you give yourself answers you don’t want to know. Pay attention to your instincts…” – Joanna Coles

6. “Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, ‘I’m possible.'” – Audrey Hepburn

7. “I’m tough, I’m ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch—okay.” – Madonna

8. “The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me.” – Ayn Rand

9. “Unless they gonna pay your bills, pay them bitches no mind.” – RuPaul

10. “You wanna fly, you got to give up the shit that weighs you down.” – Toni Morrison

11. “Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says “Oh, shit, she’s up.” – Anonymous

12. “If you are going through hell, keep going.” – Winston Churchill

13. “The future belongs to the few of us still willing to get our hands dirty.” – Roland Tiangco

14. “Women should not apologize for getting in there and taking what they want. They should not apologize for wanting it all, but they should be willing to work for it.” – Melissa McCarthy

15. “Build your own dreams, or someone else will hire you to build theirs.” – Farrah Gray