Author: Rachel Lee

Don’t get me wrong, I love a good buffalo chicken dip and a day spent in front of the TV with friends, just not every Sunday for six months straight. But we love our guys so we do what we can to keep them happy. 

From talking about fantasy football leagues, Sunday night football parties, buying team-logo beer cans, we basically deserve a medal for all the things we do from September to February. 

1. He’s constantly on his phone checking his fantasy league

2. Or in the group chat with his friends about their fantasy league

3. Nudging you and laughing “I’ve got the best league by a long shot” 

4. You see things like ‘Vick in a Box,’ and ‘Hernandez’s Not-So-Tight-End’ pop up on his phone

5. But no worries, it’s just the name of his league, doesn’t he make you proud?

6. Football is officially his number one priority for the next 6 months 

7. The well-being of his players > you

8. He can’t remember the date that’s been planned for the last month 

9. But he can tell you the date and time for his team’s game 2 months from now

10. His attire consists of mostly apparel with his favorite team’s logo

11. And if he sees even a baseball cap of yours with another team on it’ll get thrown out

12. But hey, at least he’s passionate about something, right?

13. If you can’t find him, he’s probably at a sports bar 

14. You can kiss those lazy Sundays watching Netflix on the couch goodbye 

15. And any plans you had because watching his team play is a must or he loses his shit

16. You’ll hear “Get dressed the game starts in 15” more than you’d like to admit  

17. The bills start consisting more of beer and wings than any other time of year

18. And the fridge is stocked with snacks and sodas at all times

19. If the TV is on at home, you can guarantee it will be on ESPN

20. You’ll never wonder if his team won or lost

21. Because his mood is the biggest tell

22. Oh, and whether or not you’re getting laid that night

23. He’s basically moody af from September to October

All in all, football season has a lot of pros and cons, but honestly, does it get any better than spending hours with your guy watching something he’s so passionate and spirited about? 

He’s got a heart the size of Texas and spends every day risking his life for absolute strangers. If that’s not boyfriend material I don’t know what is… 

If you’re lucky enough to say your other half if a firefighter, keep him. You’re in for a bumpy ride, but believe me, he’s worth it. 

1. You’ll learn how to truly cherish the moments you have together 

2. Because you never know what each call could bring

3.  And you’ll realize how important he is to you when he forgets to shoot you a "I'm safe" text

4. Holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries will be missed

5. But you learn they are just days and can still be celebrated with just as much love on another day

6. A lot of what he sees stays with him

7. So the nightmares are intense and often

8. All you have to do is be there to comfort him until the fear passes

9. You have your phone and wallet on you at all times

10. Because you never know when he’s gonna leave you stranded when he gets a call

11. And eventually, you get used to his crazy schedule 

12. It’s a big deal whenever he sees a fire truck driving down the road

13. His ‘fire family’ will become your family

14. And you’re constantly shown videos, memes, and pictures of anything fire related

15. His ego is the size of a match head

16. He curses like a sailor

17. And his mind is usually in the gutter

18. But what else would you expect? 

19. And when it comes to death, he’s not very empathetic 

20. So you’ll have to forgive his dark sense of humor 

21. It’s just how he copes

22. Most importantly, your firefighter will be the most loving, caring, compassionate guy you’ll ever meet 

23. And he will protect you like no one else

24.  So if you land a fire fighter, never let him go 

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In a perfect world, relationships would never end and everyone would live happily ever after without having to endure the post-breakup struggle. 

But this world is far from perfect. 

So here you are, standing in the apartment that you used to share with your used to be person, fighting over who gets to take the couch. Not ideal.

If the pain of breaking up wasn't bad enough, now you have to drag out the nightmare even longer until you figure out who gets what. Unbearable.

So please, for your own sanity, have the discussion ahead of time that you will each keep what you brought into the relationship should you ever break-up. Don't get caught in the immature game of debating who gets to keep what materialistic item.

Move in together with an understanding of who gets what if you two ever part ways. I’m not saying to go crazy and list each item. And I’m not saying to be petty if the time comes. You should just both take out what you brought in.

It’s a huge pain in the ass that can be avoided if you have an agreement ahead of time. It’s not being cheap. It’s making sure your belongings stay yours.

This verbal or written agreement will ensure that you keep those curtains you spent money on and that you won’t have to buy them for your next home for a third time.

Sure, the frying pan set was given to you guys as a couple from your parents for Christmas. But doesn’t it make sense that you get to keep it in the breakup? The answer is yes, because your mother so graciously purchased it.

Now, if you’re a generous person and you don’t mind buying another grill, even though your dad handed it down to you, go ahead and leave it with your ex. But that’s your decision and it shouldn’t be up for debate about who gets it.

If you lived on your own prior to moving in with your significant other and you purchased or otherwise acquired things during that time on your own, be damn well sure that you will be bringing it to your next apartment. 

Unless of course you decide you don’t want the item anymore. 

To avoid being called petty and cheap and getting blamed for not leaving your ex anything or for your ex saying they gave you everything (HA!), just do yourself a favor and avoid it all by creating an agreement prior to the possibility of a breakup. 

And wanting to make that agreement doesn't mean you don't have faith in your relationship, don't let him tell you that. It's a safety net because as we all know, this is by no means a perfect world.

So when shit happens, make sure you keep your own.

A birthday is just like any other day of the year.  It comes and it goes just like every other day. 

So what makes a birthday worth celebrating?

Isn’t it kind of pointless?

It’s just another Tuesday or Saturday or one of the other seven days.  You may have to work, run errands, take care of the kids, go to school, or any other activity that needs taken care of on any given Wednesday.

It’s just another day.

Or is it?

Your birthday is just that.  It’s your birth day.  X number of years ago you were given the opportunity to become a part of this wonderful world.  You were given the chance to live.

The day of your birth signifies the day you began your life.  Each year that goes by gives you the chance to reflect on how much you’ve grown and see all of the things you’ve learned and accomplished in just one year of your life.

Your birthday is a day to celebrate your life and everything you love about it.  The fact that you made it to age 2, 26, 50, or 83 and every age in between are all accomplishments.

Two people gave you this life and gave you a birthday.  It is a day to be thankful and excited for having made it to see another year.

Life is to be cherished.  Without a birthday, you wouldn’t be here.  There would be no such thing as your birthday.  No one would have gotten to experience you.

You don’t have to do anything special for your birthday if you choose not to.  The celebration can just be all within you as you let the day of your birth fill you with happiness and thankfulness to be here to experience life.

Look back 10 years ago.  Maybe you were in your teens, just trying to survive high school.  Or maybe you were in your twenties, still navigating the life of adulthood and figuring out where you want your future to go. 

Take a look at you now.  Ten birthdays later.  Look at everything you’ve been through and how much you’ve grown.  You will never go back to being 21.  So celebrate 31 and look forward to all there is to come.

So here’s to you.  Have your cake and enjoy it too.  Cheers and happy birthday!

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You know the girl…

who always has a beautiful smile on her face?

who constantly has a positive outlook on life?

who is always radiating good vibes?

who is more optimistic than not?

who sees the good in everyone and never has a bad thing to say about anyone?

who puts everyone else before herself?

who carries herself with confidence everywhere she goes?

who believes everything happens for a reason and therefore thinks her life is exactly where it should be and she seems happy with that?

who can’t tell anyone off who has done her wrong because she thinks that will make her a bad person?

who forgives even when she knows she probably shouldn’t have forgiven so easily?

who reads motivational books and quotes to learn how to inspire others and make meaning of life?

Take  a closer look.

That same girl…

will never admit there are always tears just hiding behind her soft, hopeful eyes.

has to often force that sweet little smile.

is not as put together on the inside as she projects on the outside.

who wants to make everyone else happy, but cries herself to sleep many nights.

who is tired of the bullshit, but always puts up with it because she hates placing the blame on others.

who reads motivational quotes and books primarily because she feels like that’s all she has to give her hope for the next day.  Week.  Month.

who seems to have it all together and is satisfied and happy with her life.

But she is only hiding behind herself.  Afraid to feel. Afraid to show others what’s going on in that brilliant mind of hers.

She’s upset.

She’s hurt.

She’s tired of constantly holding it together all the time.

She’s exhausted from keeping up a happy and confident persona when sometimes all she wants to do is sit down and cry.

She’s confused about every part of her life.

She tries to find meaning where meaning cannot be found.

She has no idea where her path is leading her and she isn’t always sure she is even on the right one.

You  know this girl.  You know her because she  is you.

For more work by Rachel, please visit and “like” her fan page here!

When you apologize to someone, what kind of response are you looking for?

“I forgive you.”  or “It’s ok.” or “Don’t worry about it.” “It’s fine.”

But let’s be real, do your words or actions deserve to be so easily forgiven? Is it really ok that you threatened to hit me or that you called me a bitch? Did I deserve to be treated this way, only for me to so casually tell you “it’s ok”?

Now turn the tables around. 

If I slashed your tires because you pissed me off, is it ok for you to tell me “it’s fine” and we go on about our lives? Will you so easily forgive me for slapping you across the face because you didn’t take out the trash like you promised you would?

No. No, it is not ok! None of this behavior is okay. 

It is not acceptable for you to threaten me, nor is it acceptable for me to raise my voice and call you an asshole. I will not continue to tell you it is ok as if I am letting you know your behavior is acceptable. 

And you should not be fine with me threatening you in any way. It is absolutely not suitable behavior and I also should not be so easily forgiven for my mistakes.

By saying, “it’s ok”, I am basically acknowledging that whatever happened is acceptable. So I am either fine with you doing the behavior again or I am sending mixed signals by telling you it’s ok when it really isn’t.

Instead, I will thank you for your apology.  Thank you for taking the time to realize you did something wrong and that your behavior was inappropriate. 

I will expect the same from you. For you to not be ok with my actions, but to thank me for stepping up and being mature enough to realize I was out of line. 

You don’t have to be ok with someone hurting your feelings. Don’t be misleading and tell them it is ok when it isn’t.  Acknowledge an apology by thanking them.  Don’t ever feel the need to say “it’s ok” when it clearly is not.

This is not about revenge or not forgiving someone, it is about how to give and receive an apology in a respectful manner and not making bad behavior seem acceptable to do again.

For more work by Rachel, please visit her fan page here!

Is the vehicle in DRIVE?

Are you in the driver’s seat?

Are you texting or snapping or anything of the sort on your phone?

If you’ve answered “yes” to all of these questions, you are in fact “texting and driving”.

Now knock it off!  Sure, I’ll admit I’ve briefly read the occasional text and sent a text saying “ok” or “be there in 5mins”.  And I hate myself for it.

I’m not saying to not push “next” on your phone when you need a new song.  

I’m just saying, if you’re holding a conversation where you need to be looking at your phone at all, even if for 10 seconds, your eyes are off the road. 

If this person and the conversation you are having with them is that important, make a phone call.  Put your phone on speakerphone, go through Bluetooth, or plug it in to the auxiliary port so it can even be hands free.

Don’t get me wrong, I love your want to have a conversation with me and seeing your snaps make my day, but if you’re driving, I will gladly wait!  If I’m the one driving, you will certainly be waiting for a response.

Just because you’re at a red light does not mean you’re not “texting and driving”.  

Please refer to the above questions if you are confused about why you are still “texting and driving” if you are just sitting at a red light.

I am not risking my life or anyone else’s just to respond to your text.  I’m sorry, but I’m not.  It’s not worth it.

Don’t tell me how great of a driver you are and how you are just fine to text and take snaps while you’re driving.  I don’t care if you are a professional driver and you are seriously great at driving. 

Your 10 second text with your eyes and mind not focused on your surroundings could cost me my life, yours, or my puppy’s in my back seat.  I’m not ok with that! 

Even if you are fine sending that quick snap, you sure as hell are not aware of that driver coming at you from the other lane because he or she hit a patch of black ice and at that moment you happen to be sending your bff a snap of how great your new hair color looks in the sunlight. 

Whether I personally know you or not, I will tell you that I value my life, your life, and the lives of other drivers and their passengers more than that text to your girlfriend that you can’t wait to see her later. 

You become less of a defensive driver and more of a potential hazard when you look at your phone for any amount of time.  

So please respect your own life and the lives of others before you reach for your phone to read that your brother just bailed on your dinner date. 

For more of Rachel Lee’s articles, please visit her fan page here!

So you’ve decided you’d like to start seeing a therapist.  No matter the reason, you’ve made the decision to seek advice from a professional to help better yourself.  

Here are some of the first thoughts you may have after making your first therapy appointment.

1. Am I really going to see a therapist?

2. Do I need their help?

3. I feel like they can’t help me anymore than I can do for myself.

4. Maybe I should cancel my appointment.

5. Is there something wrong with me that I can’t work through my stress on my own?

6. Oh no… how much is this going to cost me?

7. *Looks on website for initial cost*

8. -_- Are you kidding me?!?

9. I don’t know if I can afford this…

10.Will my insurance cover this?

11. Now I have to call my insurance.

12. I don’t need to go to the therapist.

13. It’s not worth this money.

14. I’ll be fine.

15. Even though I’ve been having emotional breakdowns almost daily…

16. Ok… I do need some advice from an outsider who has been trained for this.

17. Are they going to judge me?

18. No. 

19. They can’t, right?  This is their job.

20. Ok. I’m doing this.

21. For my own sanity.

22. To better myself.

23. Yes.  I am going to see a therapist.

24. No one will judge me for getting some self-help.

25. Some people turn to self-help books.

26. I am going to start seeing a therapist.

27. This is good for me.

28. I can do this.

29. I will do this.

30. Ok, I’m ready to take this step to be happier and learn how to cope more effectively with stressors that I have in my life.

As a side note, don’t be afraid of taking this step.  

If you feel like you could use some extra help/advice, there is nothing wrong with that. 

Everyone seeks advice in some way.  Don’t be ashamed for reaching out to a neutral person who is trained to help coach you through challenging situations in your life.

For more of Rachel’s work, please visit her fan page here!

After my long-term relationship ended, I had no idea how to get back in the dating pool.  After all, I was never really in it.  My past relationship started when I was in high school and lasted through college. 

Heartbreak is rough enough to begin with.  So how was I supposed to get back out there and meet people? 

Welp.  Online dating it was.

Now being only a few months out of my relationship at the time, I knew I was not ready for any sort of relationship other than friends. 

The majority of you understood that I hadn’t been out of a relationship for long and were willing to just be a friend for me.

Some of you I only communicated with online and we never met.  That’s ok.  I still am thankful to have had your attention and want to talk to me.

Then I started meeting guys in person.  It was exhilarating and terrifying all at once! 

I am so thankful for each and every one of you.  For being there for me.  You may or may not realize it, but just that one, two, three, or four dates really meant a lot to me.

I don’t talk to about 80% of you at all anymore, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t respond to a text should you need someone to talk to. 

For most of you, we didn’t connect well enough to keep up a friendship.  But that’s ok.  That’s how it works when you meet new people. 

For a couple others, we still talk sometimes and perhaps even hang out every once in a blue moon.

I just want to say thank you for everything.

Thank you for being my emotional rebound.

Thank you for being someone to talk to when I was feeling lonely.

Thank you for being a friend.

Thank you for being supportive when I needed it.

Thank you for acting interested in our conversations whether or not you really were.

Thank you for making me feel important and giving me hope that I won’t be single forever.

Thank you for giving me the confidence I needed to regain after becoming a single woman. 

Thank you for giving me a chance.

I genuinely appreciate every single one of you. 

I have already learned so much about myself and about what I want in a guy as I continue on this dating journey.  And this is all because of all of you. 

I would not be where I am today without you. 

Thank you so much!

For more work by Rachel, please check out her fan page here!