Author: Sabrina N

I know you are his hurting, because I am as well. I know that you are in a war with your mind on whether or not to let this new guy in. If you do, just know, it doesn't always end badly.

I know you've been used, broken, torn apart, and left to fix yourself without any help.

Love is so powerful. It can completely change a person. It can also completely ruin a person or make them so utterly happy. 

Not every guy you date will cheat on you or use you. There will be one guy who shows you why it didn't work with any of the men before him.

I think we meet every single person in our lives for a reason. We go through everything for some sort of lesson even if we don't know why at the moment. 

You learn things from every sort of relationship you have. Maybe you have gotten hurt so much to show you how to love and how you deserve to be loved.

I'm not saying you're not going to get hurt again. I don't know the future even though I wish I did. Just please let your guard down a bit once in awhile. Your Prince Charming might come and surprise you.

She is beautiful, caring, and wonderful, but don’t hurt her. 

Unless you can tell her honestly how you feel on a daily basis, let her go. 

She will never forget your words, but her mind will make her question your motives.

She’ll spend hours every day wondering if you’re going to hurt her like the last guy or if you will leave her worse off than he did.

When you don’t answer a phone call or text her back right away, she will question if you like her anymore or if she is scaring you away.

You can’t get frustrated when she asks if you’re okay or if you need anything, she just wants to make sure you’re happy.

When she tells her everything is fine, hug her and tell her to be honest because she’s putting on a brave face for you.

She’ll worry herself sick when you say you need a little space to figure everything out. 

She will spend hours trying to figure out what she did wrong and how she fell so in love again. 

When you leave her, she’ll be crushed once again. She won’t want to get out of bed for days and eating will make her just feel sick. 

She’ll spend her days crying and wondering how she has scared someone else off. 

Even though she might be a victim of her mind, she will love you like you have never been loved before. She will care so deeply about you and your well-being. 

She will be the best girl you have ever met.

So please, don’t date her unless you are willing to, maybe one day, say I do. 

She doesn’t deserve the pain she goes through, so please think wisely.

You’re my entire world.

When I say that out loud, I feel like a crazy, dependent woman. I’m not. 

It’s not easy to let someone you have loved for so long go, and just sit back while they fall in love with another woman. 

Since I’ve met you, I have done everything to make you happy even if I make you miserable in the process. One of my biggest flaws is I love and care mores l than most people are ever able to.

I don’t want to forget how to smell or how your eyes light up when you see me. I don’t want to have to learn the details of someone else all over again. 

I don’t want you to fall out of love with me because I will always love you.

Maybe I’m not what you need anymore, but it hurts so much for you to just forget about me. It feels like last two years have just been to help you fill a void. 

Just know that even though I am incredibly hurt, I will never hate you. I won’t ever let someone talk bad about you, and I won’t let them say awful untrue things about you.

I may be in pain but I know you were amazing to me. I just wish you would realize how much we’re meant to be together…

I will always love you, okay?

Many people don’t consider anxiety an illness, but I promise it is. It isn’t something that you can cure with some antibiotics or just have the doctor look at. For me, there will never be a cure.

“The people you choose to surround yourself with are the reason your anxious”   

This is the biggest lie I have ever heard. Trust me, my friends don’t add to my anxiety, they actually help it. If I’m having a panic attack in the car, they know how to handle me. I have dropped friends because therapists have told me to, but it doesn’t help. I promise.

“Stop worrying about everything”

This isn’t something you tell people with anxiety. They can’t just simply stop worrying. We tend to overthink the details of everything. We can’t simply just shut off our minds, because if we could we would. I promise.

Living with anxiety is like anxious feeling you get when you’re reaching the top of the roller coaster. Think of that nervous feeling, and then try feeling like that most of the day. Anxiety doesn’t always show physical symptoms, and a lot of times nobody will tell you they’re dealing with it. You can’t pray it away, and you can’t love it away. We are worthwhile even though we suffer from this. We will love you like nobody else ever has 

We are worth it!

Wow, it's crazy to think that I have spent years wishing that I could just meet you already. 

Maybe I have but neither of us have realized we're meant to be together yet. 

I just want to say thank you in advance for putting up with my crazy self. I'm not easy to love, but I am most definitely worth it.

Like most people, I have been through a lot of things. I don't open up or trust easily, so please patient with me.  

I don't mean to push you away, I'm just always scared of getting hurt. So many people have left me. These days I sort of just expect it.

Thank you for praying with me. This means so much that you'll take the time out of your day and pray for my family, our lives, and everyone that needs help. 

This is a big deal to me that my husband has similar beliefs to me. So thank you.

It's crazy to think that maybe in two years or maybe in ten, we will be together, learning each other as the days go by. 

I am not trying to rush to find you, I am simply just excited for when that day comes. 

I promise I will always love you and keep you close. 

I will never purposely hurt you and I will never leave your side when things get rough. I won't lie to you or treat you badly. 

I will always make sure your happy, and do whatever it takes to cheer you up when you're not. I promise to always be your best friend.

So thank you for being my person.

Ever since your death, everyone said the days would get easier as time goes. As the saying goes, “time heals all wounds”, but I’m not quite sure how accurate that is. I still think about you every day, and cry myself to sleep most nights. It’s been almost two years and nothing is getting easier. 

You weren’t just a grandma to me you were my second mother, my best friend, and my number one fan. You were there since day one, and there wasn’t a day you didn’t believe in me. When I thought my world was ending because a stupid boy broke my heart, you hughed me and prayed with me. 

You are the reason that I have my faith. Without you teaching me how amazing God is, I never would have him today. A lot of people go to church because their parents did, but you took your time and made me realize how much I needed him.

When I hear songs that you loved, my heart aches. Some days I question if I still remember the sound of your voice, or your smell. It breaks my heart when I realize I am forgetting the things that I was so used to on a daily basis not too long ago.

Just know, when I have children they will know about you. I’m sorry you arent able to meet them in person, but they will know how amazing and precious you were. Please watch over them like you do for me.

Every day for the rest of my life, I will think about you. I will remember the woman that made me who I am today. I will be thankful that I got an amazing 18 years with such a wonderful soul. I will forever be greatful to have called you my grandma, my second mom, and my number one supporter 

As I am sitting here with a broken heart, I am realizing everything we will never be again. 

If you took me back, nothing will be the same. 

You will never look at me again like I am the most beautiful girl you've ever seen. I will never again feel safe and calm when you put your arm around me. 

We will never be able to do the crazy adventurous things we once used to, and feel so in love that only that moment matter. 

You were everything to me. 

You taught me how to love. You taught me that I am worth so much more than some give me credit for. 

We both learned many lessons from one another, and I hate to see that go. 

But even though we won't be together anymore, I will always love you.

You will forever be my first love and hold a special place in my heart. 

One day, when I have a daughter and she asks about the first person I fell in love with, I will smile and tell her about you. 

I will tell her he was a gentle soul and he helped shape me into becoming who I am today. 

I will tell her, even though losing you broke my heart, I'll be forever grateful for those years we were together. I will be honest with her about everything.

So thank you for letting me go as well. 

I know that you lost feelings, and I know I will be happy again. Maybe it won't be soon, but I will be happy again. 

You deserve so much and thank you for making me realize I do as well.