I think the worst part about you is the fact that you are such a heartless bitch. You don’t even see that everything you do is for your own personal gain. And you don’t care what it does to other people.
I spent so many nights listening to complain about everything in your life. From your grandma to your other friends to your boyfriend. And even though I sometimes thought you were over reacting, I never said it. I was always 100% supportive. But for some reason you didn’t see that.
And even when I needed you the most all you did was talk about yourself and your problems. And I let you because I actually cared.
I would have done anything for you and most times, I did. Whatever you needed I was there. Except the one time I wasn’t because of something else that was important and you couldn’t handle that. I tried so many times to please you and it was never enough for you.
I’ve loved you since we met and maybe that’s the problem. With so many people who walk out in my life I desperately tried to hold on to something that was already gone.
You are nothing more than a heartless conniving bitch now and I honestly think that’s all you’ve ever been and it feel so good to finally admit that to myself. Because for so long I always kept going back to you even when I knew it would never work.
I think the worst part about me, though is that I let you do it to me. I let you pull me back in every time I decided I was done with you. And the shittiest part is I’d let you do it again. If you called and needed someone, I’d be there. And it’s because you’ve made me weak. Even now I hope for you to be an aunt to the child I’m going to have.
But I just have to keep reminding myself of who you actually are and not what you trick everyone into believing that you are. A heartless bitch who doesn’t really care and only pretends.
So for the sake of my sanity, your sanity, please just leave me alone. Because no matter how much I wish we could move past everything and be friends, you are never going to change.