This Bro Only Matched With A Girl On Tinder To Bully Her

Trying to meet dates online is difficult enough to begin with, without people going out of their way to be jerks. Tinder, especially, is rough because all you’ve got to go on is a few pictures without all the information that an actual dating profile gives you. So you have no idea at all what someone is like beyond their looks.
Continue reading This Bro Only Matched With A Girl On Tinder To Bully Her

Guy Gets DNA Test Results And Finds Out He’s Dating His Half-Sister

DNA tests like 23AndMe are all the rage right now. People are excited to find out exactly what nationalities comprise them, sometimes learning that their ancestors weren’t who they thought they were. One cool thing about the tests is that they shed light on a person’s family history and sometimes even help people find relatives they didn’t know they had. Only, in this case, that didn’t turn out to be such a good thing at all.

A Redditor whose user name, AccidentalxIncest, (uh-oh) sort of spells out the problem, posted in the TIFU subreddit about how his girlfriend bought them both 23AndMe kits for Christmas.

I’ll let him take from here:

 

Throwaway, obviously. I also made the same post over at r/23andme.

I just found out a few hours ago and my girlfriend and I are currently a mental wreck.

Quick background

My girlfriend (I’ll refer to her as Sarah) and I have been dating for a little over than a year and our relationship has been going very well. We both happen to come from the same town and met each other in college after being introduced by a mutual friend of ours.

Here’s where the FU begins to unravel

Last year for Christmas, Sarah decided to come over and stay with me at my apartment for the holidays. I also had decided not to go home for the holidays either. Plus, all my other roommates were back home visiting family, so we had the whole place to ourselves. It was perfect.

Christmas day rolls around, and Sarah had bought the both of us 23andme DNA kits. The thing is, is that we were both conceived by in-vitro fertilization via sperm donors. Both of our fathers were infertile so our parents had no choice. Deep down, the both of us were hoping to find our biological fathers through the service.

Okay, so both of them are looking to find their birth fathers.

Fast forward less than a month later to today, and both of our results are in. Sarah comes over to spend the weekend and we go through our results together on our laptops. We compare our ancestry and health reports and nothing seems off. I even found out I’m 2% Native American. All was well until we arrived at the “DNA relatives” section…

Sarah tightly holds my hand and says “I hope we both find our fathers”. Then I open mine up….

At the top of my screen, I see Sarah’s name…. “27% DNA shared…half-sister……….”

Sarah starts hysterically laughing and tells me to stop joking.

I don’t react to anything she says, and just stare at my screen in disbelief.

I then abruptly grab her laptop and open up her “DNA relatives” section. We see the same thing. My name at the top… “27% DNA shared…half-brother”

At this moment my brain just completely short-circuits…..

I’VE BEEN HAVING SEX WITH MY HALF-SISTER. HOLY FUCKING SHIT. WTF

What a complete nightmare.

My mind starts going a 100mph and I began hyperventilating, going into a state of shock. I can’t even remember what Sarah was doing at this time.

It’s pretty self-explanatory by now, but for those of you who don’t understand how we could be related, it turns out our moms were probably both fertilized by the same sperm sample. What are the fucking odds, right? The fact that we’re from the same town certainly increased the odds but still.

6 hours later, just typing this entire post makes my body shiver. There are no words I have to express what my mental state is now. To put it in simple words: I feel traumatized. Part of me still won’t stop thinking about how much I love Sarah and then I realize our entire relationship was incest. I honestly feel disgusted standing in my own skin. I’ve even been contemplating suicide.

Sarah and I haven’t talked at all since going into shock.

Right as I’m finishing up this post, Sarah has grabbed her stuff and left my apartment a few moments ago.

I’m probably not going to respond to any of your comments/questions for now and I honestly want to be left alone in the corner of my room. I really just needed a place to vent all this.

He added a “Too Long; Didn’t Read” summary of the situation at the end of the post.

TL;DR: Former gf and I are both sperm donor babies and come from the same town. We take a 23andme DNA test and find out we’re each other’s half-sibling. Meaning I’ve been having sex with my sister for over a year. Turns out we both were conceived from the same sperm sample, go figure.

I do not give permission for my post to be used in the making of any movie, story, book, etc.

He also added three edits. The first said that he was getting support from friends and the second thanked Reddit for giving him support.

EDIT: My mates just came home and are giving me support.

EDIT 2: RIP inbox. Thank you all so much for the support. I just logged back in and didn’t really expect this post to blow up. Last night was rough. Sarah’s friend/roommate called letting me know Sarah was home. As of now, Sarah and I still haven’t talked. But after an night of thinking, I believe I’ve come to terms with what we’ve discovered. For those of you who still think this is fake (I honestly wish it was), here’s a screenshot showing our shared DNA (https://i.imgur.com/Z0zm9xi.png). I think the best way for Sarah and I to heal is to go back home (our town) and see how this all began with our families. Only then will we be able to accept the reality. I’ll post more updates as things develop.

The third edit included proof of the DNA results, for anybody who thought he was making this up.

(EDIT 2)Proof:(https://i.imgur.com/Z0zm9xi.png)

 

Redditors did offer lots of perspective advice, which might have been at least a little helpful.

It’s understandably a pretty traumatic experience, so I think it’s best that you and your girlfriend have some time apart.

However, at some point I would recommend two things: 1. Talking to her about the results and, 2. Getting a second test done by another reputable service or medical provider. Your family doctor may even have a recommendation.

As you said, this is a pretty phenomenal circumstance. Before making any sort of long-term, final decision about your relationship, verifying the test results should be a priority.

Maybe I’m just too open minded but I don’t think you did anything wrong or disgusting. I mean it’s not like you’re actual brother and sister that grew up together.

Not saying I’d just continue or anything, but I can’t see how you could’ve known or prevented this so keep your head up ?

No children, no harm done.

Imagine you got to the point in life you decided on having kids and found out then. Compared to that this is a very happy ending and you both dodged a bullet.

LaconicalAudio

What’s disgusting about incest is having a romantic/sexual relationship with someone you’re so intimately related to that you grew up with each other from birth.

In this instance they’re only half related, and likely had completely different upbringings in completely separate families. Genetically it’s still not a great idea, but morally and ethically I don’t think there’s anything here to worry about.

Qyro

Well, this is quite a sticky situation. Hopefully the Reddit poster and his girlfriend/half-sister figure stuff out in a way that doesn’t leave anybody any more traumatized.

h/t: Someecards

Woman Curses Guy Out After He Refuses To Pay $126 For Her Food On First Date

Deciding who pays on a date can be a little tricky. Historically, men on dates with women tend to pick up the tab for food, drinks, movie, etc. But times are changing, and now it’s not so automatic. A lot of people think the person who did the inviting should be the one to pay, while others are happy to go dutch.

It’s just not a given anymore that a man is going to pay for a woman on a date, which is great, because it’s actually a sexist tradition and one that makes no sense.

Recently, a man going by CuteBananaMuffin on Reddit posted screenshots of his text conversation with a woman who was absolutely furious that he didn’t pay for her very expensive dinner on their first date. He didn’t even know she was mad until he texted her asking for another date, and then she went off on him.


Since she was the one who did the inviting, our buddy CuteBananaMuffin assumed she’d be paying for her own food. Plus, she ordered LOBSTER. I mean, why do that if you’re expecting someone else to pay? That’s a lot of money. And on top of that, as he mentioned, he’s just a student. How could he be expected to afford that?

Wow, she’s living in the past if she thinks the man is ALWAYS going to pay. Come on.

Well, at least he was honest with her!

Speaking to Bored Panda, Mr. Muffin explained,

“The date was fun at first until she started talking about another guy and how much he liked him, but I thought ‘let’s eat, talk and leave’ since she’s into another guy, and it all crumbled when it came to the bill. She was shocked that I let her pay. She didn’t say anything at the time, but from her facial expression, I realized she was furious.

I usually pay for both sides when it comes to the bill, but I’m a student and I work 60 hours a week to pay for food, books etc. so I obviously couldn’t afford to pay 110 euros for her food. I asked her out again to apologize pretty much for the previous time, hoping we can go to a cheaper place so I could make up for it, but as you can see, the result was really bad…”

Reddit users sounded off in the comments and pretty much everybody agreed with Muffin.


Time for this lady to join us here in the present, where women can have jobs and pay for themselves (and even their dates if they want!) when they go out. Also, again: LOBSTER?!

h/t: Bored Panda

Guy’s Plan To Fake Food Allergy On Date Backfires Spectacularly

People naturally want to impress their dates, but this dude’s plan ended up ruining his whole evening.

A guy posted in the subreddit “Today I F**ked Up” a detailed, hilarious story of how he pretended to have an onion allergy while on a date in order to force the restaurant to give him the freshest possible guacamole.

He got the super fresh guac, but let’s just say things did not turn out as he planned.

He told the waitress that he had an “extremely severe allergy to onions” so that they would make a fresh batch just for him and his date. Pretty cool, right?

Actually, no, faking an allergy when it’s a serious condition that affects some people that’s not meant to be taken lightly just because you want fresher food isn’t very cool.

How bad do you feel for the restaurant at this point?

Okay, all’s well that ends well. Except it wasn’t over.

Here he is, a healthy 25-year-old adult, who just faked a serious, severe food allergy in order to get fresh guacamole. I know, I know, guac is serious business, but…come on.

At least his friend wasn’t afraid to set him straight. Not cool, dude.

Having had to pay (literally) for his misdeed, we can be sure he won’t be pulling this stunt again.

24 Dudes Who Tried To Sext But Ended Up Ruining Everything

Online dating means anonymity and an enormous pool of willing applicants to choose from. So it’s not really surprising that dudes are on there trying out the world’s worst pickup/sexting lines left and right. They have very little to lose, after all.

But, still. Some of these sext attempts are just…a lot. Where do these dudes even come up with this sh*t? Some of them were clearly cribbed off more clever people on Reddit. But others are the result of unrestrained horniness, and/or stupidity, and/or just willful ignorance? Honestly, I don’t know. I couldn’t tell you. Nobody can.

But there is one among us who is dedicated to documenting all these sexting fails anyway. They go by the Tumblr name of straightwhiteboystexting, and before you get all mad about the name, let me offer an explanation straight from the horse’s mouth: “The name of this blog is based off of the phenomenon of the “straight white boy text” aka asking “hey what’s your bra size ;)” in the middle of a conversation, or things like “what would you do if you were here haha lol ;)”. Basically things that even if you want to sext with the person, they either completely ruin the mood either because they’re not sexy or because it pretty much puts all the sexting work on you. The phrase “you sext like a straight white boy” comes from this. Boys of all orientations and races do this. And not all of them do it, either.”

So there.

1. Christopher, who started off so strong:

straightwhiteboystexting.org

2. This dude, who asked the perfect thing if his intention was to disgust:

straightwhiteboystexting.org

3. Sadegh, who clearly has way too much going on:

straightwhiteboystexting.org

4. This guy, with the perv cat:

straightwhiteboystexting.org

Girl Gets ‘Weirdest Snap Of Her Life’ And It’s A Lesson In How Not To Slide Into DMs

There is no shortage of unusual, pervy, and outright befuddling conversations around the web. Whether the screencap in question of of a Snapchat conversation, a Tinder/Instagram DM, or a straight-up text message, the world’s (men’s) capacity for shooting their shot, often unprovoked, defies boundaries.

Sometimes these messages are from exes, desperate for a second (or third…or fourth…) chance. Sometimes, they are from complete randos who have a lot of time, not enough attention, and a desire for nudes. And sometimes, they just…must be seen to be believed.

Such was the case with Twitter user @NatalAbusaada, who shared a recent Snap of a conversation between her and a dude named Jon.

Jon claims to have an uncle who works as an executive for  Sephora and also holds a share in Urban Outfitters (???) and could thus get free swag for Natal…provided she send him fart videos.

“ok my uncle is an executive for Sephora and has a share in Urban, so if you want you can pick whatever you want from their site and send pics of everything,” he wrote. “I’ll let him know and he’ll get it from the warehouse. I can mail it to you or he can send it to a Sephora/Urban near you with your name.” Ok, so far so good. “He sends my sister free stuff to try out all the time that she keeps.” Kinda weird to mention that she keeps it, but ok.. “Just send lots of snap vids of you farting. I’ll get u everything u want.”

We do not condone kink-shaming (to each their own!), but a word of advice to Jon: don’t put yourself out there with such aggression and not expect consequences.

A reply to Natal’s tweet also dredged up Jon’s Tinder bio:

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We know this is Jon, because of the uncle/Sephora/UO connection. But we also learn that no, Jon is not joking, and is also willing to date a lucky girl rather than just getting her free makeup and fast fashion. Jon also claims that he “can probs b ur sugar daddy,” though the free stuff is coming from his uncle, so we’re skeptical.

https://twitter.com/danielbaylock/status/1081435690062233601

Oh, and he’s a finance major. A fact Twitter delighted in.

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Everyone else just encouraged Natal to do the right thing.

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Since the tweet went viral, it was revealed that Jon tries this tactic on many an unsuspecting young woman.

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Unsurprisingly, it never works.

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