Life sucks more often than it doesn’t these days. You feel like you’re stuck in a deep hole that you can’t get out of, and no one can help you.
The sky is raining cat piss and you can’t afford an umbrella because it’s either that or no pizza, but you’re learning about yourself—and life, more now than ever before, so you’re not letting it get to you.
In a way, you’re proud of your home you’ve built in rock bottom.
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In an attempt to shop for groceries like an adult, you end up getting a frozen pizza.
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You grew impatient waiting so you took it out early, and ate it alone in your bed in one sitting, even though it was partly still cold.
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Your card gets declined at least once a week. And usually when you’re about to purchase something essential, like tampons or coffee.
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For every day you have more than one meal a day, you have to skip one in the coming days.
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You leave the house without a bra more often than you leave the house wearing a bra.
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It rains every time you go outside without an umbrella, even if rain wasn’t in the forecast. And when it rains, it pours.
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You bought shoes knowing that it would overdraft your account.
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After reading all of the drunk texts you sent your ex, you smile to yourself because you’re actually pretty proud of the insults that drunk-you came up with.
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You don’t ask anyone for advice anymore. Not your mom, not your best friend, no one. You rely on yourself to get through this because you don’t get disappointed in yourself for not taking the advice you prescribe.
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You identify with Kristin Wiig’s character in Bridesmaids.
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At this point, your wardrobe is pretty much exclusively sweatpants, all of which have holes in the butt and/or crotch.
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It takes you three to five hours to get out of bed every day. Because your best friend’s dad’s Netflix account is always there for you.
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You ate an entire plate of nachos on your last date, and he admitted he kind of thought you were going to share it.
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Since you’re always too tired to do laundry, you’re wearing your underwear inside out. And will until all of those are dirty—on both sides.
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When that happens, you’ll probably just buy new underwear, which will probably overdraft your account. Whatever, everything is gonna be ok. Not today. Probably not tomorrow. Maybe not any day soon. But someday.
And once you kick rock bottom’s ass, you’ll be on top of the world. One day, you’ll laugh about your dark days in a walk-in closet filled with shoes and all of the puppies.
