You and lady luck have been bro’s from the beginning. You don’t know if it’s your sunny disposition, the universe watching your back or something on more paranormal level, you just know that if things need to fall in your favour, they probably will:
1. Red lights aren’t a thing.
You have no idea why people complain about their commutes, all you have to do is look at a traffic light and it turns perma-green. Does this not happen for everyone?
2. You always make it just in time.
Oh you’ve been late before, but only when it doesn’t matter. When you gotta be somewhere the stars will align, the roads will be empty, the elevator will be waiting and you’ll stroll in like you’ve got hours to spare. Never in doubt.
3. Job interviews are done deals.
Turn up in your laundry day outfit with seconds to spare, half the experience they’re looking for and hungover from last night’s shin-dig. You’ve got this in the goddamn bag.
4. You’ve won national competitions on a few occasions.
What the fuck are you meant to do with six lifetime supplies of vanilla pudding?! #luckypeopleproblems
5. Your friends refuse to play poker with you.
You may have no idea how to play the game but that doesn’t stop you from raking in all your pals hard earned moolah. Pocket aces are meant to be good, right?
6. You always got the toy in the box of cereal.
This one is from the kiddy days, but it demonstrated that you had the luck gene from day dot. Your siblings didn’t get a look in when it came to scoring that magical piece of film themed plastic.
7. Casinos are cash machines.
Apparently the house always wins, which you’ve always thought is a weird name to call your wallet.
8. Good weather follows you.
Vacations are never going to be spoiled by the local climate. You’re a weather god and the skies are just there to worship you.
9. You don’t need an alarm, you never wake up late.
…apart from when you do. But you don’t sweat it ‘cos you can guaran-fuckin-tee the day you turn up tardy is the day the boss stays at home.
10. You’ve never lost an eBay auction.
You don’t wanna brag or nothin’, but you’ve never paid more than a ton for a pair of Jimmy Choos. Suck on that Barney’s.
11. People think you might be a wizard.
I mean, why wouldn’t they, mysterious things are always happening to you, you have unexplained powers that no one can replicate and you look dope in a pointy hat and robes. You were a born Hogwarts candidate, man.
12. Have you ever lost a coin toss?
Or rock, paper scissors, connect four, jenga, monopoly, or twister. I mean, sometimes you let other people win, but deep down you know you could always swing it back in your favour, lady luck’s got your back.
