It happens to all of us. You’re scrolling through your Facebook newsfeed, or even just talking to a human person in the so-called “real world” when BAM—you feel bad about yourself.
Maybe your co-worker got the promotion you wanted. Maybe your friend is taking selfies in Berlin while you’re stuck at home working minimum wage. Maybe you’re single and your ex just got married. (Anyone else ever been invited to an ex’s wedding on Facebook? No? Just me? Cool.)
Whatever it is, it gives you that terrible, awful, no good, very bad feeling of “What do they have that I don’t?”
But you don’t know the whole story.
Do you post pictures of yourself stress-eating donuts home alone on a Saturday night on your Facebook page? Probably not. No one does. Social media is fun, but it’s also carefully curated.
Same goes for, y’know… life in general. People talk up their good fortune—but it doesn’t mean their lives are all sunshine and roses. They smile and post pics of brunch, but you don’t know what’s going on underneath. Behind every beautiful Instagram is a whole lot of invisible struggle and heartbreak and probably student loans. Everyone has their insecurities, even if their eyeliner is on-point.
Everyone is different.
Or maybe that person who looks super together on the outside really is super together. That’s cool. What works for someone else doesn’t necessarily work for you. Your friend might be head over heels in love with some drip you wouldn’t date in a million years. Your roommate might be living it up at a job you would hate.
You don’t have to follow some other person’s definition of success.
In the words of Amy Poehler: “That is the motto women should constantly repeat over and over again. Good for her! Not for me.”
There’s always room at the top.
Sometimes is can feel like there’s a finite amount of happiness in the world—and that b*tch over there is hogging your share of the happy.
But we all know that’s not how things really work. Someone else being happy, or pretty, or successful doesn’t take away from you being your own brand of awesome. Being happy for other people isn’t always easy, but it always feels a hell of a lot better than being jealous.
Someone out there is envious of you.
Even if your life feels like a hot-mess-trainwreck-sh*tstorm-clusterf*ck right now, someone out there is wishing for what you have. Chances are, your life isn’t always a heap of garbage—you’re probably crushing it in more ways than you know.
Ok, yeah, it’s hard to constantly count your own blessings, and it’s impossible to never compare yourself to anyone at least a little bit. But if you’re obsessing over someone else’s journey, you’re going to miss the one you’re on.
