It’s pretty difficult to take the high road when guys feed us this much crap. Like please, spare us, and just be brutally honest, we can handle it.
And yet, here we are, he’s trying to “let us down gently” when in reality he’s just sounding like a major douche. So sorry, but if he thinks we’re just going to sit here and listen to the trash coming out of his mouth he’s got another thing coming.
“I love you, I’m just not in love with you.”
Honestly, don’t even dignify him with a response. Just laugh as hard as you possibly can.
“It’s not you, it’s me”
“You’re so right. I didn’t realize how much I was settling.”
“I really just need to work on myself.”
“Finally, we can agree on something. You have really let yourself go, after all.”
“I think we should see other people.”
“Wait, were we not already doing that? Oops…”
“We’re just on two different paths right now.”
“You’re right. I don’t think I have the right shoes to take the path to nowhere anyway.”
“I hope we can still be friends.”
“Friends don’t let friends date assholes. You not only let me date the asshole, you are the asshole.”
“If you love something, let it go, and if it returns it was meant to be.”
”Alright, see you never!”
“I really need to focus on my career right now.”
“Don’t you need an actual job in order to focus on one?”
“I’m just not ready for a serious relationship.”
“I don’t think you’re ready for any relationship right now. Or, ever.”
“I just don’t feel that spark.”
“Worst. Sex. EVER.”
You know the saying “nice guys finish last?” Well, we refuse to finish last so screw being nice.