The only good thing about adulting is your excuses actually check out.
Unlike when you were younger and your friends would see through your bullshit lies and force you to hangout anyway.
1. “My dog has diarrhea.”
Dog, cat, fish, whatever. Animals are way more important than going out.
2. “I can't go, I just took out Harry Potter from the library again.”
Finally someone understands the importance of staying home to read a good book.
3. “I had a long day at work/school, I neeed to decompress before I jump out the window.”
For real, work sucks.
4. “It’s Monday, the Bachelor is on.”
Yup.
5. “I’m a broke ass bitch, and so are you!”
We work all day and still have no money.
6. “I have sooo much homework.”
This only works if you’re in college, but good enough.
7. “I need to clean this shithole, my parents are coming tomorrow.”
They can't know my life is falling apart.
8. “My parents are here.”
Ugh.
9. “I already took my pants off.”
Bra off + pants off= not going anywhere
10. “I have a bottle of wine in my fridge and it's calling my name.”
Can't afford to drink in a restaurant, so I choose to black out at home.
11. “I promised a friend I would edit her paper.”
Again, only college time will work for this.
12. “I need to meal prep because I'm fit AF.”
And I need to get over myself, but still get those #gains.
13. “I have literally the worst migraine ever”
Not even Advil can help you at this point.
14. “I’m having a movie marathon, alone.”
Just a girl trying to cry and fall asleep, you got a problem with that?
15. “There is a great online sale I can’t miss.”
When you're broke, you gotta buy what you can
16. “I have a FaceTime date with my parents.”
It's better than them visiting.
17. “My little sibling has an event I'm getting dragged to.”
Even if I’m not going, she has one.
18. “I don’t have any clean clothes or quarters to do laundry.”
BAB: Broke. Ass. Bitch.
19. “I have to work early tomorrow.”
Actually an adult thing.
20. “Na, I don’t want to go.”
Honesty is key!
Growing up is great, but it sucks when you can’t say your mom said no. The best thing is, the people you use these on will understand and not even judge you.
Read more of Jessica's articles here.
