There’s nothing in this world that could possibly prepare us for that one FB notification we all dread.
When our ex settles down for the long haul. We’re sure she’s a great girl, and they’ll be really happy together, we just can’t shake that salty feeling that this is actually real life.
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“I need to call Becky. She’ll FREAK.’
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“If she says ‘aw’ I’ll hang up on her in a hot second.”
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“This is not ‘aw’ material. His new girl is gross.”
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“Speaking of… I should do a little investigating myself.”
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“Good lord.”
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“Did someone say photoshop?”
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“There’s no way she looks like this in real life.”
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“I’m somewhere between happy he moved on for good and a little bit salty about that ring…”
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“Sucks for her she has to spend the rest of her life with him…”
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“Welp, that could’ve been me. Thank God I dodged that bullet.”
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“He was literally the worst.”
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“The definition of immature.”
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“I guess not anymore…?
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“What was so great about her that changed him?”
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“How did she possibly get him to grow up when I was unfortunate enough to date that man-child of a human being?”
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“Maybe I should add her…”
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“No, that’s weird.”
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“I could like the post though…”
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“Nope. That’s worse.”
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“I’ll just stalk from the sidelines, don’t mind me.”
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“No, but really, I’m happy for him…”
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“Happy that he’s officially completely out of my life!”
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“There’s honestly no where else I’d rather be in life than single AF and not tied down to that guy.”
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“I definitely don’t need a stupid engagement ring to feel fulfilled.”
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“But damn it is nice though…”
