35 Truths of the Girl Who Literally Can’t Live Without Coffee

It’s almost like a sacrificial ritual, you lose sleep to gain more coffee. To sleep an extra 15 or go get a coffee…. Def coffee.

1. Kids have ice cream trucks, why can’t adults have coffee trucks?

2. My birthstone is a coffee bean

3. Coffee: The Adulting Fuel

4. I don’t drink coffee to wake up; I wake up to drink coffee

5. Wanna hear a joke? Decaf.

6. Be full of coffee, not hate

7. Coffee is the original black magic

8. Some girls just want to have fun, I just want to have coffee

9. The only thing getting “lit” this weekend is my coffee maker

10. I may not cry over spilled milk but I’ll lose my mind if I spill my coffee

11. I’m not in denial about my addiction, now go buy more beans

12. There’s a time and a place for decaf: never and in the trash

13. The most dangerous drinking game is seeing how long I can go without coffee

14. Coffee: Starter fluid for the morning impaired

15. It’s like a high five in the mouth

16. Good days start with coffee but drink it all day long just in case

17. We all have that one friend who loses it if they don’t drink their coffee. In my world, that friend is me.

18. I never said that I would die without having coffee. I said that other people would die.

19. My force does not awaken without coffee

20. Spilling a cup of coffee as an adult is the equivalent to a child letting a balloon go

21. I eat salad every day: Bean salad. Coffee bean salad.

22. You can call me a pothead. A coffee pothead.

23. Coffee: Because morning people cannot be trusted

24. A coffee an hour keeps me from going sour.

25. My body is basically a filter: Coffee goes in, sarcasm comes out

26. I’m holding a mug of coffee, so yeah I’m pretty busy

27. On the bright side, my coffee will never get cold in hell

28. I’m not everyone’s cup of tea, but I drink coffee so screw them

29. My favorite winter sport is walking to the nearest coffee shop

30. Coffee is the answer, I don’t remember the question

31. If you’re reading this please bring coffee

32. Coffee: Liquid joy juice

33. Afternoon forecast: 99% of coffee

34. Love is in the air. I can smell my coffee brewing

35. In coffee we trust

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