Hey,
You may be feeling a little unsure of your choices right now, but you needn’t be.
You’re only concerned about the consequences of your actions, not the actions themselves, so turn off that monkey noise. Thinking back on things already done doesn’t change a damn thing.
Quiet those fears because they aren’t going to get you anywhere. Besides you’ve never let your fears control your actions, so why let them stress you out about things that have already come to pass?
Guess what? You’re not perfect. You’ve never claimed to be, and people shouldn’t expect you to be perfect now. (Don’t worry, they aren’t so squeaky clean either.)
If anyone around you does judge you, then maybe they shouldn’t be near you. Hell, you know that. They don’t know what it’s like to be in your body—even if they are the person that knows you the best out of anyone else—they’ll never be able to say for certain that what you did wasn’t right for you.
You don’t need to apologize to anyone for what you’ve done or who you are. Oh sure, your actions in the past have been questionable. There’s no denying that, and you can’t say for certain that if anyone else would’ve done the same, but you’ve done what you’ve done, and there’s no taking it back now.
That’s OK because whatever it was that you did—you needed to do for you—and that’s the only person who matters.
Staying true to yourself, there is honor in that. Upholding your values and being exactly who you are, there is beauty in that. As far as anyone’s concerned, choosing between being authentic or doing whatever everyone else is doing just to say that you did it the exact same, the choice will always be the former.
You have to choose you.
That’s what you’ve done, so really, you don’t need to apologize to anyone, and honestly, no one’s watching. There isn’t a little man looking down on you from an invisible cloud with a little magnifying glass, recording your actions down on a clipboard. Your individual actions don’t carry a tally, so we can throw the score board out now.
At the end of the day, as long as you can say for certain that you did what you needed to do, and if you could go back you wouldn’t change a damn thing—that’s all that matters.
People can judge. People can preach, but they’ll never be you. Your life will never be theirs, and their lives will never be yours.
So, if you’re happy, then I’m happy for you. You are you, and you don’t need to apologize to anyone.
Sincerely,
The Girl Who Approves (whose opinion really doesn’t matter either.)
For more of Brittany Ann’s writing, follow her on her Facebook page.