Dear __________,
" I hate the way you talk to me, and the way you cut your hair. I hate the way you drive my car, I hate it when you stare. I hate your big dumb combat boots, and the way you read my mind. I hate you so much it makes me sick, it even makes me rhyme. I hate it, I hate the way your always right, I hate it when you lie, I hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. I hate it when your not around, and the fact that you didn't call, but mostly I hate the way I don't hate you, not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all."
I always thought if I just slowly stopped talking to you, even as friends, my life would be easier because I wouldn't have to see you with other girls. I wouldn't have to have that sinking feeling in my stomach. So I did stop, honestly it was awful.. I liked you so much it hurt. It hurt me to see you flirt with every single girl. It hurt that no matter what I did, I knew I never would change your mind on how you feel.
I talked to you last night for the first time in awhile, you had no idea I was even mad on you, which is kind of bullshit considering I used to talk to you all the time, and I went about 2 whole weeks of not talking to you. How would you not know?
I explained to you that when you liked my best friend but she liked someone else, that feeling you had when she picked him, that sucky feeling. I told you I felt like that all the time being your best friend because you would come to me with girl problems, and I couldn't come to you with guy problems because you were my problem. I tried to "flirt" like normal girls, but even you knew I wasn't just a normal girl. You told me that someday I will find someone that loves me for me, or find someone better but ______ you were my better.
You were better than any other guy I have ever liked, or ever dated. Before you I only dated selfish, rude, only looking for one thing, kind of guys. They were only ever worried about themselves. You cared about me when I cried and helped me through everything, you were by my side when my aunt was diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer. You were my shoulder to cry on, the sunshine on a cloudy day, but when it came to me, I was just a "convenience"…
I wish you knew that I saw all the stars in your eyes, and the fact that your smile literally took my breath away. I wish you knew that every time you would talk to me, my mind went crazy trying to make sure I didn't end up saying something stupid. I wish you knew that I wanted to hate you, but I simply just couldn't because letting you go would mean letting all the time I tried to be yours was for nothing. I wish you knew that I'm okay with being friends considering the other option would be to never talk to you again, which would probably tear me apart. I wish you knew that whenever your name went across my phone, or I heard someone talking about you that my heart skipped at least 300 beats.
I slowly fell in love with you, and now its time for me to stop. Eventually we will lose contact, and I will have to learn how to live without you.
Sincerely the girl who would of gave you anything.
