Today you told me not to contact you. I actually thought hearing (well…reading) those words would be harder than they actually were to read. I think because I know when you get bored, or break up with the 'new girl' if there is one, you'll be back. Not that I'm waiting for that day, but when it comes I'm going to smile knowing that I once again am something you want.
See, you are the one who told me how good I felt. You were the one that had to make yourself known to me. You were the one who gave me your number, who invited me over, and who asked me to go to breakfasts with you. You saw something in me, not quite sure what, but I felt it.
I can analyze the past, how we could make each other laugh, how you always wanted to spank my butt. How you laughed the first time I spanked yours. How you didn't argue with me after a while when I claimed your dog as mine. The things we said, how you actually paid attention to what I was saying. I developed feelings for you, yes. I think what destroyed us was when I told you I did, and you didn't want to admit you had the same feelings for me too. If you didn't, you should be an actor, because you put on one hell of a performance.
Until we cross paths again, I'll sit back and watch. Don't be mistaken, I'm not waiting. I'm watching. Maybe we'll cross paths at a point in our lives when we can have each other. Maybe not. I'll just take satisfaction in knowing you developed those feelings, and you ran because you didn't know how to handle them.
I know that there will be days that I miss you. There will be days that you will be all I think about, and that is ok. There will be days I'm mad at you, and days that I want to see you. Although those days will come, and they will pass, I won't reach for you. I'm going to leave you alone as you requested, and continue to work to get through the bad days.
