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Dear Alcohol: Maybe It's Time for Us to Say Good Bye

Alcohol, I think it’s time for us to take a break—

You have done me more harm than good, you manipulate my emotions and actions. You speak for me, when I know I shouldn’t say anything. 

You bring out all of my insecurities. You’re the monster that lives within me and I refuse to let you come out ever again. 

You find a way into my heart to cause this pain of misfortune and misery, a deep loss, I constantly regret the loss of others around me.

You have destroyed me. You have brought me to my breaking point. I was hooked, you got me hooked, you were my escape, my way to get out of reality—I thank you for that. I also hate you for that. 

You took away my passion for the things I loved. I stopped writing, I stopped reading and I stopped learning. I didn’t care, nothing mattered. 

I became wasted space because I was getting wasted. I was in the most abusive relationship in my life and it was my own doing.

I’m tired of being your puppet and letting you manipulate me into being someone I’m not. Before you came into my life I was secure and found beauty in every aspect now I just see pain and evil. 

You make me seek revenge and for some odd reason, I let you have a grip on my life, well, not anymore. It’s time—it’s time for me to fight back and get what’s rightfully mine.

I am the controller on my body. My body is a temple, my body is art and my brain is a chaos of beautiful thoughts that won’t be destroyed. 

My spirit won’t be destroyed and my dignity will not be affected. You no longer have a hold on me. You have given me one too many bad nights and this is where it ends. 

This was my last straw and this is the day I decide to get out of a toxic relationship.

If it doesn’t make you stronger, it makes you weak. If you don’t let it go, it won’t ever leave or let go of you. Guess what; I let go, so your grip on me is now nonexistent. 

You don’t realize it, but this is the best for everyone. It’s best for my health, my financial situation, my family and friends, as well as for you because now another lost soul has a chance to come find you until they realize your toxicity.

As for us, this is good bye.

This is page 1 of a new chapter.