Oh, ‘F’ words. They can include more traditional words like family or friendship; or perhaps freedom if you’re some kind of self-proclaimed patriot.
‘F’ words can also be used in more serious ways such as to refer to social issues and inequalities, how we feel, and what we eat. They can even refer to a person or thing in a more decorative and elegant way.
For example, “I believe freedom of religion is essential to achieving equality in this country. Or “Shut up you fugly Justin Bieber-like man child. See? So colorful and so fun! The possibilities are almost endless (unlike the fries at Red Robin…because apparently seven refills is their breaking point).
It just so happens that my favorite ‘F’ words are f*ck and feminism. Why? Because feminism is f*cking important!
Now before you light your technological device on fire and throw it out of the nearest window, hear (read?) me out. Social, political, and economic equality have not yet been achieved for everyone in this country. Women (and women of color especially) are overwhelmingly denied access to resources and opportunities simply because of who they are.
Feminism is not a trending topic. I am not “looking for attention" or “trying to fit in". And while we’re at it…I am certainly not denigrating men. I am also not going to start wearing my hair in a loose bun barely held together by pencils while demanding everyone refer to me as Moon Goddess. Although it would be f*cking hilarious…hard pass.
Feminism is not an attack on any one person (so sir…calm down). It is simply a critique of our behaviors, expectations, and the institutions that shape the way we view and treat women. You might be thinking: “What the f*ck does that even mean?"
Well, allow me to walk you through an as-brief-as-possible run down on what girls and women experience in this country on a regular basis because burning us at the stake is no longer legal.
It goes a little something like this:
“Go outside and play! I don’t care what he’s doing; you need to stay close by.
Don’t go over there- your dress will get dirty.
You should play sports! Wait. Aren’t you too old for sports?
Respect yourself. He’s mean because he likes you.
Speak up, we can’t hear you.
Quiet down, everyone can hear you.
Say what is on your mind. That is no way for a lady to talk.
Wear makeup. Not too much, though.
Why aren’t you wearing makeup? Are you sick?
Be polite. You say ‘sorry’ too much.
It’s OK to not want children. A woman’s purpose is to have children.
Stay thin. Why are you that skinny?
Don’t walk alone at night. You were alone with him, what did you expect?
Be assertive. Why are you being such a b*itch?
Be more independent. Find yourself a nice boy.
You don’t have to laugh at everything he says. Why don’t you have a sense of humor?
Show them that you’re strong. What are you, insensitive?
Make yourself look pretty. What kind of attention are you after?
Support yourself. Does he mind that you support yourself?
Go to college. Don’t act too smart around him- it’s a turn off.
Make money. Don’t make too much money- that’s his job.
Build a career. Put your career on hold to have children.
Practice safe sex. What are you, a slut?
Make sure you always eat less than him. Ew, you should eat a cheeseburger.
You’re so smart! When are you going to learn to cook?
It’s your body. You can’t do that.
It’s so overwhelming. It’s kind of like taking the blue and red pill at the same time in The Matrix and not being sure where you are or how you got there. Is this reality? Am I an illusion to a larger metaphorical hell where Red Robin stops refilling your French fries altogether?
How do we make it stop? Should we petition? Should we find a new burger place?
Whelp; meet me in the field of dandelions next to the willow tree. Did I mention that my name is f*cking Moon Goddess?