So you got in a fight. Again.
That's okay, it happens. Take a deep breath, and try to let your emotions calm down a little bit. These things happen to literally every couple out there. You are not the first couple to fight and will definitely not be the last.
Every couple has their own unique fighting style based on the two people. Some will verbally yell back and forth as soon as something comes up. Some will discuss it at a later time. Some will keep their distance until they've calmed down. It all really depends on the people involved and what they are comfortable with.
Fighting is normal. It's a form of communication in a relationship that is commonly undervalued. No, you don't want to go looking for a fight and picking every battle you can. There are better, less intense ways of communicating with your special someone. However, it is okay to fight. Sometimes things are not said or not said fully until a fight comes up.
Or, maybe you're not even outright fighting, you're just in a rough patch right now. Something is preoccupying one of you, if not both of you. Communication might be tense or forced, and maybe things don't feel as natural as they used to.
Whatever your situation may be, it's okay. Relationships go through ups and downs, and you need to remember that. Don't throw in the towel because it gets tough. Keep choosing into your relationship.
When you're fighting, remember what you are actually fighting about and keep it to that. Address the problem itself, and do your best to form solutions as a couple with minimal finger-pointing. You are not fighting against your significant other – the last thing that you want to do is cut them down. You are fighting against the problem, so never take it out on your special someone.
When you're in a rough patch, remember that it is temporary. That situation too will pass. In the mean time, take steps to address whatever the problem is. If you both are preoccupied with something (financial problems, family problems, health problems, etc), what can you do to better the situation? You may not be able to fix everything at once, but always take strides to better things.
It is never you vs your significant other. It is never you vs your girlfriend. It is never you vs your boyfriend. If you believe that, despite the situation you are in or the fight you are having, that this relationship is worth it all, then you are never against the other person. You are against the problem, the situation, the trouble, the difficulty.
You are never against each other. Never.
You fight for the other person, and you fight together. You fight to solve a problem and better your communication. You fight to make a situation, no matter how difficult, the best it can possibly be. You work together and come together as a couple to address whatever it may be.
Please, never view yourself in a light that you are against the other person. You love them with your whole heart and should always, always be on their side. That is the only way that fighting for the relationship is worth it. You two are always together, and you are always against the problem. There is no other way to fight where both of you can win.