A break up sucks. No matter the circumstance, no matter the responsible party. It hurts in every way possible and can knock the strongest woman right to her knees.
You’ll temporarily become an insomniac, you’ll lose weight from only eating ice cream, you’ll cry your eyes completely dry, and then one day, the sun will shine. You’ll wake up and realize you had finally fallen asleep. You’ll catch yourself eating an actual meal instead of binging on frozen dairy and you’ll look in the mirror to see that your eyes are no longer swollen and chaffed from wiping away the endless tears. That day is your new beginning and that day is not to be wasted!
Most of us hopeless romantics have our own process for which we get back on our feet, but others don’t. If there’s anything I’ve learned from my many failed relationships, it’s this:
- Cut those ties! You may think you’re being the better person by trying to just be friends, but you’re hurting both parties! You need time away from one another and that doesn’t just mean physically. You can’t force yourself or another person into trying if they’re not 110% invested, so just let it go.
- Limit your Social Media time. We all know Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, etc. can be deadly to a lady in depression. You WILL survive without checking your notifications! I promise!
- A “break” IS a break up! Don’t lie to yourself by saying, “oh, we’re just taking a break from one another”. STOP THAT! Regardless of your plans to reconvene after you’ve given each other time apart, you’re still not a couple. *Note: If you are on a “break”, please refer to step 1.
- Rely on your bestie(s)! No matter what we tell them, they are in our life for this exact reason: break up support. This is a real emergency! Pick up your phone and call that FAMbulance! They are trained professionals in this field and can provide everything you’ll ever need.
- Plan a spontaneous trip. If you’re living away from home, book that flight. If you’re living at home, load that car. Either alone or with friends, a trip to a different scene is always therapeutic to a spirit on the mend. *Tip: Refer to step 2. Try leaving that pesky phone at home!
- Puppies are a girl’s best friend! Animals are special in ways many people don’t realize. Dogs can sense a broken heart are the perfect snuggle-buddies for those weekend-long Nicholas Sparks binges. Plus, who doesn’t love playing with a puppy? *Note: This works for other furry friends too!
- Take a new selfie. Whether you post it or not, getting all dolled up to take a selfie is empowering! Roll on the lipstick and flash those pearly-whites! (Then send it to his best friend! *wink wink)
- Spend time with family. They’ve been there through every stage of your life and have loved you no less. It’s important to remember they genuinely care and their love can be just as special as the love you just lost.
- Dig out the old hobbies… Or find a new one! Tennis, sewing, baking, dancing, anything! Previous hobbies bring out the inner child and new ones add a notch to the belt. Either way, they’re a great distraction and a wonderful way to keep the mind from becoming depressed.
- Encourage yourself. It’s easy for us to lose sight of our self-worth, especially after feeling the rejection of a failed relationship. The best thing you can do your yourself is be your number one fan. Write little post-it notes with your favorite inspirational quotes, tell yourself how loved you are, and don’t give up.
Never, ever give up. You are worth every bit of the atoms that make you whole.
