You were playing the field. We didn't have a relationship. You weren't mine and I wasn't yours. I know that now.
I also know that I did not love you. I liked the idea that maybe I could start over again with a fresh love, though. I liked the idea of living in a small rent house and having you by my side again. The only thing I loved was the way you made me feel…
I felt like you protected me.
I don't think I've ever felt that way before, and I'm sure that's why it's so damn hard to let go. I felt safe knowing I was shielded by someone who would risk his life to protect me. I can't even begin to tell you how that made me feel.
You listened.
If I said I liked or didn't like something, you remembered. We had conversations. I wasn't afraid to be myself in front of you, cause let's face it, you are just as weird as me, if not more.
You always wanted me.
I never once felt unattractive with you. Not only did you want me sexually, but it felt like you wanted me in other ways too. You wanted my heart, soul, and mind…you opened up to me and let me open up to you.
I miss you.
I've tried very hard to move past your memory, and some days it works and other days I fail miserably. Some days, I wish that you and I never happened. Other days, all I wish for is you. I was someone who was broken, my spirit and self-confidence were nonexistent.
You helped put some of the pieces back together. Then you left, just as quickly as you came in.
No one can tell another how quickly to move on, how to forget someone, how to put away their memories, or how to heal. After all that you've helped me with, can you really blame me for not being able to completely let you go?
Do you even think about me?
