I never asked for this. You were never supposed to mean so much to me.
You came into my life when I was at the most vulnerable stage in my life. Naturally I clung to you as if the very air you were breathing would save me from drowning. I had spent so many years in a miserable relationship where I was numb, but when I met you everything changed. I felt emotions I hadn’t experienced in years and found myself craving your presence.
This happiness was short lived. Just as quick as you came into my life, you left. Only… you weren’t quite gone completely. You made sure to pop in and out of my life for several months. Weeks would go by without a single word from you and I swear I could literally feel myself going crazy. I found myself coming up with any way to initiate contact with you; posting several snapchats on my story, asking you to hangout, and even making sure I was at the gym when you were.
My entire day’s mood became solely dependent on whether or not I talked to you. I could feel my friends irritation growing more and more each day that I stayed hung up on you. I tried my absolute best to get over you because it wasn’t fair for you to play this hot and cold game with me. I don’t mean to put all of the blame on you because I’m definitely at fault for remaining hopeful for too long that one day you’d realize you wanted to be with me.
I wasn’t sure the day i’d be over you would arrive, but thankfully here it is. I no longer beg for you to hangout with me, I don’t look forward to seeing you at the gym and I certainly don’t jump at my phone each time it rings hoping that it’s from you.
I’m a firm believer that everything happens for a reason so I trust fully that God sent you to me. But as of now, I’m still unsure exactly what that reason is.
