My, how the tables have turned haven't they? You're telling me how that you miss and love me more than I know, and I'm telling you how much I don't want to hear it.
Don't you get it? You dropped me like I was yesterday's news. You wanted me, then didn't. You wanted me, and then once again, didn't.
It's all a repeated cycle that's gotten old.
Now you want me again? Why? Because I became emotionally unavailable? Or is it because you can't bear the thought of my feelings changing?
It's like even though you didn't, and maybe still actually don't want me, you want me to want you. You're not Cheap Trick, get the fuck over yourself.
I waited for you for so long…I wanted you so bad that it hurt.
I felt like a desperate and foolish dumbass trying to show you how much you meant to me.
And what did you do? You tied an invisible string around my heart and yanked me around. You kept walking away but pulled me back whenever it was convenient for you.
You got so comfortable and was so satisfied knowing you could do whatever you wanted, and I'd still love you. Is that why you hurt me over and over again? Because you knew I'd forgive you because I cared about you?
Wake up call, I wasn't going to wait forever. I told you that.
I told you either get your shit together and give us a shot, or I was going to walk away. You never took me seriously. You thought I was bluffing.
Until now. Until it finally sank in that I was tired of your fucking games and that I meant it. I wasn't going to wait forever for something that was never going to happen.
I refused to let some guy keep me hanging around for his own personal amusement.
I felt so torn, so trapped, so lost. I didn't want to just give up on something and someone I loved, but I couldn't stay stuck in a never ending game that was going nowhere. We were going nowhere the entire time, weren't we?
I hate that it turned into that. I saw the red flags, I felt that gut feeling, everyone tried to warn me, and every sign screamed, "RUN!" I just choose to ignore it all. I had to find out for myself, the hard way.
I took a chance and a risk by loving you, and I lost it all.
I don't hate or regret you. I don't even regret not walking away sooner. I know I did everything I could to love you the hardest, and in the end, it just wasn't quite enough.
Hitting that breaking point and seeing how far gone I had fallen was my wake up call. I saw you in a whole new light, and quite frankly, I wasn't impressed.
Now, the tables have turned.
I can't help the fact that no matter how hard you try now, I don't believe one word that comes out of your mouth. I don't think I ever will, not after all the shit you put me through.
I warned you months ago. I told you, "I know you're not ready for anything right now, but please know I won't wait forever."
Sorry not sorry, but I can't do it anymore. I can't wait forever. I won't let myself sink any further into your twisted games just so you can stay afloat.
I can't wait around for you to magically turn into the person you claim to be.
