We all have “friends” that we come to realize are very, very toxic. These are the people that use you, abuse you, take advantage of you, walk all over you, and yet, try to make you look like the bad guy.
They’re good at hiding their vicious intentions. In fact, most of friendships with these people seem to go along swimmingly for months and even years in some cases without you even seeing their true colors.
There’s the type that accuses you of being the bad friend and a terrible person and you apologize and vow to be a better friend, but it’s soon apparent that no matter what you do they always find ways to be upset with you. Until finally, you stop being their doormat.
Upon reflection, many of the things they accused you of didn’t happen. The things they insist you said were never said. The actions never occurred. They are master manipulators, and could even make you believe things that never even happened.
Being the victim is the only thing giving them life – as if it is their purpose.
You see, there’s no possible way to reason with someone who is only concerned with making themselves out to be a victim. They are always right, and you will always be wrong.
Why admit you’re wrong when you can blame someone else and manipulate those around you to believe you? Why stop being the victim when you’re already so damn good at it?
As a result, it is necessary to cut these people out of your lives. Not because they’re not important to us, but because we’re giving more than we’re getting. And you have to ask yourself at what costs are you willing to go to save a friendship where you’re always walking on eggshells, waiting for them to snap again?
Eventually, we’re going to get sick of the random outbursts, the false accusations, and the pity parties. We’re going to want to surround ourselves with positive, fun people who care not only about themselves but you as well. And we should, we deserve the good friendships in our lives.
So you know what? It’s completely okay to make that decision and cut toxic people out of your life and pursue individuals who make you feel like you have a purpose other than being a scapegoat for someone and their unsolved issues.
It’s okay to walk away and say, “I’ve had enough of this.” And if that’s too hard, it’s okay to disappear without a trace, too. Therefore, live a healthy life, no matter what, even if it means saying goodbye to some people who have been there for a while.
Originally published on Unwritten
