I’m writing this letter in anticipation of the fact that one of these days I’m going to have to let you go. Not just in the formal sense, but also mentally and emotionally. I’m going to need to tell my heart to stop loving you because my mind knows you aren’t good for me.
I’m going to have to fight hard to keep you out of my thoughts and continue to remind myself every day not to think about the happy times. I don’t know how else to put an end to this. We broke up months ago, but my heart hasn’t wanted to forget you.
My mind still goes back and forth as to whether or not we might be able to make this work one day. But, I’m getting tired of hoping for you to come around. I deserve more than just someone who wants to see me once a week. I deserve more than someone who isn’t sure about why he keeps seeing me or why he wants to stay in touch. I deserve someone who recognizes my worth and knows he wants me in his life.
You are not that person.
You stopped being that person a long time ago by your own choice and that choice changed everything for us.
We will never be able to get back what we lost. Too much has happened. I resent you too much and have bitterness towards you built up in my heart. Time heals, but I don’t know how long it will take me to erase those negative feelings and by then I would hope that we’ve both moved on.
I will always love you.
You have been my person for so long and it’s for that reason that the thought of not having you in my life has seemed nearly impossible. But, I’m stronger now than I was before. I know how to be by myself.
I have passions, family and friends that fill the spot in my heart that my love for you used to occupy. I am growing as a person and that growth is in a direction that isn’t leading me towards you.
Thank you.
For loving me the way you did during the time that you did. Thank you for accepting me when I needed to be accepted and being patient with me when I needed someone to be patient.
But, more than anything else, thank you for letting me go. I would have fought for us forever if you had let me. But, I can’t fight for someone who doesn’t want me. Thank you for releasing me when I couldn’t release you.
I know there is someone out there who is going to love me in all the ways that you couldn’t and fight for me in all the ways that you can’t.
I hope you find that person for you too.