Leaving You Was Not the End but the Beginning

For what its worth, we had a great run as a couple. You weren't only my other half, but you were my best friend too. 

I don't think anything hurt more than the end of our relationship because I thought that leaving you was the end of me, but it wasn't, it was just the beginning.

The thing about ending a toxic relationship is that although it hurts, and the pain is unbearable, it's also freeing. You broke me and I apologized and begged for you back, but I know now that I shouldn't have and I'm glad we didn't work out. 

I was never in the wrong when it came down to it, I would've gave you the world in the palm of my hands if you really wanted it. I'd bend over backwards and travel the ends of the earth for you if it meant it put a smile on your face and a flame in your heart. 

After all that I did for you, you still took me for granted and manipulated my worth as an individual, and I know now that I will never allow that to happen ever again.

I thought that I needed your acceptance, your constant approval and compliments to feel important and special. I thought that I needed you to get by because I was nothing without you. I thought I needed you in order to be me, but that's not the case and I'm glad that I figured that out.

Leaving you was the beginning of me, the journey through a path only I alone could travel and understand without you. Since leaving you, I've realized just how happy I am with myself and who I am. 

I go out more, I take care of myself better and more importantly I make choices for me and me only. I am the sole provider of happiness within myself, and getting to this point took a long time and I'm still working out the kinks but I'm happy. 

I used to restrict myself from so many things due to the fact that I always thought that I needed your acceptance, except that wasn't true at all because the only acceptance I ever needed from someone was myself. 

What you put me through was awful and hurtful, but I'm still standing here on my own two feet picking up the pieces and giving myself the closure you never allowed me to have. 

Thank you for breaking my heart and letting me realize what exactly kind of woman I am, and what I actually do deserve from someone. I used to think that I'll never find someone like you again and to be honest, I hope I never do.

I thought leaving you was the end of me, but it wasn't, it was just the beginning.

Published by

Megan Derouin

a  headbangin spirtual basshead Twitter handle: @shmegsxo Facebook URL: http://www.facebook.com/shmegsxo

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