I will wake up each morning and see myself in the mirror, noticing every insecurities that I have, and start convincing myself that life is beautiful, it’s gonna be just another day, just keep going.
It’s hard to live a life with insecurities. I feel like I always have something to hide. Looking at the ground while walking is a habit, afraid to make eye contact with people I walk into. Keeping up with a conversation is a real struggle. I utter for words, and though I have something to say, I just keep it in for I don’t know how to express myself. I will always be the quiet one in the group, naming me as the listener but never as a speaker.
Aside from these, there’s this attitude where I feel comfortable staying at home alone, scrolling through internet or playing my favorite songs instead of going outside and party with friends.
Because of this, some people think that I’m a snob, unfriendly, boring, someone who doesn’t know how to get along with people.
The truth is, I want to talk to you. I want to make friends with you. But there’s this wall I hardly break, this railing that stops me from reaching out on you.
In spite all these, I am still trying to go out of my cage and be brave to face life, to see how beautiful the world is, and that no second should be wasted by keeping myself inside the dark without realizing how colorful life is.
To you who are experiencing the same, you are not alone. I know what you are going through, I know it’s hard. We might take time believing that there’s always a brighter side, but trust me, I know there is. Everything’s gonna be okay.
Smile. Learn how to love, most especially yourself. Be happy.
