I've been with my boyfriend for nearly four years. It sometimes feels like we have been together for eternity, but other times it feels like we were just in the butterfly stage weeks ago. By butterfly stage, I mean that period of time at the beginning of a relationship when you get that funny tingling feeling in your gut every time you see them. You hang off of every word they say, long for their kisses and get completely intoxicated every time they touch you. This stage of a relationship is so new and exciting, it's hard not to be just a little bummed out when it starts to come to an end. Of course, there are tons of ways to keep a long-term relationship exciting but there is no arguing that things just aren't the same once you've achieved a certain level of comfort in a relationship. Sometimes I reminisce about the days when we would talk on the phone for hours, playfully arguing about who was going to hang up first, but once I started comparing that stage to what we have now, I realized there is no way I'd want to go back. Here are three reasons I love the long-term stage SO much more than the early days.
1) No makeup, no problem
For the first 6 (ish) months of our relationship, I refused to let my boyfriend see me without makeup on. Obviously this was ridiculous because he totally didn't even notice when I started going without makeup occasionally, but it was something I genuinely worried about in the beginning. Once you reach the long-term stage, makeup is not a concern whatsoever. Actually, nothing about your appearance is a concern and I've gotta say, as a girl, not feeling the slightest bit judged when you're laying around watching Netflix all plain-faced and crazy-haired in sweatpants is a pretty magical thing.
2) Comfort
Not going to lie, things do get weird (and gross) at times, but this is still one of my favourite parts of being in a long-term relationship. This is embarrassing but there's no way I'm the only one who did this so I'm going to share any way. For the first few months my boyfriend and I were dating, I would do things like run water whenever I went to the bathroom just in case he could hear it and hold my burps and farts in until I ended up with the worst gas pains ever. It seems so funny now, but it was actually pretty stressful and I don't know why I did that… apparently I didn't want my boyfriend to know that I had a functioning human body. I don't remember when or how it happened, but one day it just became ordinary to have burping competitions and inspect each other's weird moles and I am so happy it did.
I'm not saying that every long-term relationship needs to involve an audience while you poop and that kinda thing (everyone will have their own boundaries), but I'm not definitely not upset that I can't remember the last time I peed with the door shut.
3) BFFs
A lot of the time, being in a long-term relationship is like the world's longest slumber party with your best friend. I'm not even kidding. The majority of our time together is spent binge watching Grey's Anatomy while cuddling and eating junk food and if that's not a slumber party than I don't know what is. For real though… it's like having a roommate that knows you better than anyone else in the world. He knows how I like my eggs, how I like my back rubbed, when I get my period. He knows my favourite foods, pet peeves, and all of the things I am passionate about. He understands my personality and knows what I'm feeling (sometimes before I even do) and is always there to cheer me up when I've had a hard day. There is no conversation that is off-limits with us and we can always go to each other with our problems. Of course we have our own issues, bad days and fights and sometimes it can be really hard work maintaining a long-term relationship, but, once you get past the awkward first few months, I promise things can be even more amazing than ever. I mean… who doesn't want to spend year after year facing life's challenges with their best friend by their side?