You’ve called it quits time and time again.
Always at the least expected moments, when I couldn’t be happier and you’ve led me to believe things were fine. Every time, I tell myself that I wouldn’t be able to survive you again.
Yet the moment you look me in the eyes and tell me all of the things I need to hear, I melt into you as if you had never hurt me before.
I am breaking this cycle. You can’t neglect your partner and expect them to bend and break on your behalf. I’d always ask myself, “How could anyone ever let this man go?”
Now I know why. If this is what you want, I am not going to beg for you to stay any more. I have realized my value, whether you see it or not. I am walking away.
You will never feel love the same way. You are going to miss the way it felt to be loved so passionately. It scared you at first, but you were entranced.
You had never been loved so fiercely. After everything you have put me through, that never changed.
You knew you could count on me to make you feel like the most important man in the world and you took advantage of it.
No one will ever put you first the way I did. In my eyes, you were priority. Your happiness directly correlated with my own. I have dropped everything to be with you on your terms. You consumed my mind and I treated you like a king.
You’ll never find another love note sitting on the nightstand. You will never come home to your favorite snacks in the fridge or the random gifts that I couldn’t pass up getting for you.
You are going to miss having a live-in maid. Despite what you believe, the house doesn’t clean itself. There isn’t a magical laundry fairy that washes, dries, folds, and hangs your clothes.
Your food doesn’t miraculously appear on a plate and those dishes sure the hell don’t just rinse clean. You were waited on hand and foot by an under-appreciated spouse.
You are going to have to learn how to scratch your own back. You chose to walk away from a woman who worshiped your body when you hated it yourself. You’ll never feel my fingers run through your hair.
You are going to yearn for the feeling of my lips on your shoulders when we would wake in the morning and the way I would rest my hand on your thigh as you drove. No one’s body will ever fit perfectly with yours the way mine did.
You lost the person who you could talk to. You could turn to me for anything. Whether you wanted to nerd out about the newest video game, chat about the news, or talk about your past, I was always ready to absorb what you had to say.
There was never a point in time where I was anything less than responsive.
I actually cared about the words that came out of your mouth.
You are going to miss my smile. Not just the act of smiling in itself, but the smile that was reserved for you. My eyes lit up every time I heard your name.
I would catch myself staring at you with a ridiculous grin on my face because I felt as if I were the luckiest girl in the world.
You are going to miss the moral support. I have always been so proud of you and I have stood by your side while you made life-changing decisions for yourself, for us, for your career.
I believed in you and I tried my hardest to encourage you to succeed.
You are going to miss the way I fought for you and for us. I have literally fought a man for you. I defended you endlessly, no matter how many times I had been warned that you weren’t the man that I was blindly in love with.
As your woman, I felt that it was my job to defend your honor and fight for what we had. Even after you broke me, I relentlessly pursued you.
You are going to miss how annoying I can be. Yea, I can be in the way. I require too much attention. I can ask stupid questions sometimes and I act like a little brat. Look at it this way, you were the one I longed for it from. I didn’t run to anyone else to fill the voids you were leaving.
You are going to miss my independence. I didn’t need you. I wanted you. The financial benefits of being with you meant nothing to me. You could have lived in a box on a street and I would have stepped up to fill those shoes.
You are going to miss knowing that no matter where you were, there was always someone at home waiting for you. Someone who loved you unconditionally. A woman who could never fathom being unfaithful. A partner who would hold it down while you were thousands of miles away.
You are going to expect me to come running back into your arms. I hope you can handle disappointment as well as I did.
