She betrayed our friendship the worst ways and then came crawling back to me after a long time of not speaking, waving the white flag. She, who had been the biggest backstabber of all, reached out after I had almost erased her betrayal from my heart and memory.
At first, I thought it was an apology, but the more and more I reread her message, I realized it wasn’t an apology at all. It was more of wanting to clear her guilty conscience.
At first, it seemed sweet of her, but then I remembered who I was really dealing with. She is the sneakiest snake of them all, and she’s so good at being two-faced, that I almost started to believe it.
Her betrayal has really changed my heart. I can no longer trust people like I used to anymore. The fact that someone who could be so close to me and could turn against me so quickly really marked me for life. It now makes me question people's loyalty and overall trust. I'm more guarded when it comes to which friends I allow to get close to me.
No way I will fall for it again so her sincerity seems questionable to me now. How her stone cold heart just made a miraculous recovery is beyond me. I guess I just have a hard time believing that after all this time, she’s been thinking about me. That she’s been plagued by guilt and desperately needed to get it off her chest.
I have a hard time believing anything that comes spewing out of her mouth. I will not allow my good heart to be betrayed again, not by her or anyone. I learned my lesson.
When I needed her the most, she turned her back on me. She played both sides and told me that she loved me and would always be there for me. But she was the total opposite of there for me.
Why now? Why all of a sudden does she feel the need to reach out, to attempt to make amends? There's no amending anything – what little friendship we had in the beginning has managed to fleet. The wounds will always be there – scarred over as a lingering reminder of the hurt.
It'll always be her knife that cut the deepest. Her sorry attempt to salvage our friendship is despicable. What kind of a person would I be if I just allowed that toxicity back into my life?
Wishing me the best in life is not an apology. Despite hating her to the very core, I managed to muster up a cool reply, "Thank you, hope all is well." I mean that, I do. I wouldn't wish ill-intent on anyone (even though she deserves it), but I refuse to reopen that chapter of my life.
I just finished healing, I just moved on. I just accepted that horrible things happen to good people sometimes and that's all there is to it, and now she wants to weasel her way back in?
Nope, sorry. Never going to happen.
Part of me thinks she wanted something, that she needed my help or she wanted all the gossip on my life. But she lost that opportunity the moment she twisted that knife into my back, and she can't just come back in and try to rip it out.