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Soul Mates: Romantic or Platonic or Nonexistent

Every person thinks they will find one, have found one that they fucked up, or will continually search for one.  In honesty it's a useless method as soul mates probably don't exist in the ways in which our hearts desire.  Your 'soul mate' can be several people who you share a deeper connection too that doesn't necessarily require a sexually attraction or romantic undertones.  They can very well be people you chose to keep close because of unknown reasons.  You ever meet someone and it's like you have known them all along.  The saying goes, soul mates never really meet for they have been inside each other all along.  That's where that familiar feeling comes from.  I believe in cosmic energy and spiritual realness.  You can be around those who match your vibes.  There are some soul mates who require intimacy to conquer their full potential but it shouldn't be confused with a "perfect match."  Love no matter in what form requires work.  Soul mates may even have to work harder because though they may be pulled toward one another, their lives may be forcefully being pulled in opposite directions.  Work, family, and a whole list of situations can prevent a relationship from maintaining its healthiness.  It doesn't mean even if the relationship fails, they weren't your soul mate, the closeness is undeniable because it was real.

A lot of us find these people in interpersonal relationship mainly within the same sex as us. It's stronger than the normal friendships you share, there is something special about them because they get you on that deeper level.  These people end up either your best friend or that friend whom you refer to as "family".  I used to want to desperately find my soul mate.  I had a friend who I met through other mutual friends.  We used to hang out in college and it was never anything more than friendship.  At the time when we became friends I was in a pretty serious relationship.  A few years went by and the relationship I was in started to fizzle.  I guess when your heart is really attached to another, there is nothing that can distract it.  I hung out with that same friend during those times and there were tons of sparks flying.  Even the other friends took notice, like hey, you two are getting increasing closer.  It took me by shock honestly because we had hung out plenty of times before and it was never even flirtatious.  I could not get him off my mind and it seemed like every time we were close there was this palpable energy I would feel so strongly.  We would finish each others thoughts, respond to others in the same way, and could just sit in silence for hours holding hands.  Silence became the best thing because we had no clue what to say.  I ignored a lot of the emotions I was feeling because I was freshly out of a bad relationship and any man who had something charming to say was my new boo.  But this was different because it felt different.  I thought he was my soulmate because I had never felt that way towards anyone before.  I had stronger feelings for him than for the man I ended the relationship with.  As it goes life happens and nothing materialized past friendship.  We are no longer friends and that feeling has passed.

 I thought I had found them for many years but then I adjusted my brain to the understanding laid out in the previous paragraph, you will have more than one. There is not one person in the World for you but more so different people who come in and out of your life for very different yet vital reasons.  Sucks to think about it but even those you call enemies are placed in that position to provide something to your soul.  Eventually once we use up what our souls needed we will start to drift.  Being in a relationship and keeping it healthy has many factors but when you think you've found the one there's an overwhelming need to "make it work".  You begin to think but he's my soul mate, or she's my better half, I know it, how come it's not going according to the soul mate plan.  Maybe your in the midst of the drift and you hadn't notice it because you're trying to make it work.  The tell sign should be the trying to make it work point.  Relationships run their course eventually.  Some of those courses lead  you to death do you part and some of them lead to a real life changing love story for you to reminisce about.