It’s inevitable after your S.O. decides they don’t want to be with you anymore, your mind races with a million different questions.
We’ve all been there. I’ve asked those questions over and over again after having my heart broken. Now that I reflect back, I feel like I might have the answers to those questions.
1. Why don’t they love me anymore?
In most cases, they probably still love you. However, they might have come to the realization that they are not, in fact, IN love with you. And that really does make all the difference.
Instead of putting it off and dragging it out, they’re actually doing you both a favor. Cutting a relationship short because there isn’t a permanent future gives you both more time to find the one who really is meant for you.
2. Where did I go wrong and was it something I did?
If you were both constantly fighting, I think the answer is obvious—you two were not that compatible. It wasn’t you; it was you two together.
If it was a sudden change of heart, it probably wasn’t something you just did. It was simply the fact that they came to a slow realization that what you two had together was not exactly what they wanted in life.
3. What can I do to make them stay?
You can ask them this and they’ll probably won’t have an answer. If you have to beg them to stay, that doesn’t sound like love, does it?—So let them go.
If he needs you to change key aspects of what makes you you, does he really love YOU? You will find someone who will love those aspects of you. You don’t have to change who you are.
4. How will I ever start over with someone new?
It’s hard thinking about being with anyone other than the one you’ve loved for so long. So don’t even think about anyone new. Instead, focus on the one who is hurting you right now—YOU.
You’re not ready to jump into something new. Allow yourself some time to heal. Love yourself. When you’re ready, you’ll find that it isn’t that hard to let someone new in.
5. Am I not enough for them?
You are more than enough. But everybody has their own, different needs. Just because you didn’t fill one person’s needs doesn’t mean you’re not enough. There’s someone out there that only you can satisfy!
We are all locks and keys. You just have to find that wondering lock or key and see if the two of you were made for each other. It can be tough, but once you find the one who fits you, all your trouble will be worth it.
6. How do I get over this hurt?
More than likely, slowly. It is going to take some time. It’s okay to cry. But find something you enjoy or that will take up your time.
Most of all, and don’t let your questions torment you. It sounds so cliche, but there IS someone out there for you and you WILL find them! So don’t spend too much time feeling heartbroken—date yourself; love yourself. Because you’re pretty awesome and you deserve it.
