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This is Why You Should Never Ask a Couple When They're Having a Baby

Despite everyone’s personal thought about a new or existing relationship, you will always have the family and friends looking in, making comments about what they feel is the next step like  "You should have a baby".  

If I could count the number of times that I have heard this, I would have run out of fingers and toes.  I am all about wanting a family, but the last thing I want to hear is people telling me over and over that they think it is time. Whether they are parents wanting grandchildren, like yesterday, or friends that have baby fever and apparently elected you as that lucky friend, I want to have a choice for when I feel ready. 

Honestly, hearing it over and over makes me want to punch someone in the face compared to conceiving and carrying a child for everyone to gawk over.

I love children, I really do, but I also love my peace and quiet.  I love the man that I am with and the time that we get to spend together cooking and eating a quiet meal, watching a good movie, and cuddling up for some restful sleep without throwing a child in the mix.

Being able to decide mid-week that we are going on a mini-vaca to a hotel a few hours a week is fantastic! Currently we don’t have to plan for a sitter, diapers, wipes, toys, and the other endless amount of things that go into our car just to be gone over night.  We can throw a few outfits into a book bag and just go, and I love that

Maybe we want to have a baby maybe not, so when you say your insensitive comment, you are implying that something is wrong with us. You don't know anything about our relationship. Whether we have been trying to conceive for months or even years, or maybe we have struggled with having early term miscarriages that we decided to keep private. You telling asking is just a big mistake. 

Maybe things are not going as good as you think behind the scenes. Maybe we are struggling to keep it together, or maybe we are to the point where we have already fallen apart. There is so much that goes on in our lives that your input can honestly be more hurtful than helpful.  

Whose business is it anyways what we are doing with our lives and our bodies? Having children is a life time commitment, filled with not only your time and dedication, but for us women, our bodies. We just committed to each other, and that is a large enough step.  We are not looking to step to quickly. Why rush the time that we have to share with each other?

We are constantly learning about each other, falling a little more in love day after day. There is nothing that I would love more in the future than to have someone look up at me and call me mommy.  To see my man holding a little bundle of joy, smiling, possibly crying at the most beautiful thing to have happened, but I want that to be our decision.

We do not need the encouragement of others about how to live our lives, we are doing just fine! So please, refrain yourself when you thinking about asking, "When are you going to have a baby?"


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