When I met you, I didn’t really think anything of you, nor did I ever think we would become what we are now or gotten where we've been. I met you at home, but then you moved 7 hours and too many miles away from me for work.
I never thought we would try to continue our relationship and try to make it another 5 years. We talked for hours a day and talked on the phone every time we could. We planned our future, we planned our wedding and our future kids.
We couldn’t see each other for years after you moved other than through facetime and snapchat. I stood by you, though, because I never wanted to lose you.
Then, about a year after you moved, I met someone else and we ended everything.
During that time, my relationship was never great, and at the worst parts of it, that’s when you reached out to tell me you missed me. I never said anything back but god I wish I would've then.
After I got my heart destroyed by that relationship you reached out to me again and said you missed me once more. That’s when I finally started talking to you again.
It was the best decision I could've made at that point. You became my only happiness and you weren’t even here with me. For years after that we got closer and closer, we always talked about how we were going to see each other over the summers.
God I was in love with you. You were a few years older than me and I loved it because you were very nice looking and it made me feel great about myself, that someone as cute as you could like me let alone love me.
Yes, you loved me and I loved you. I also fell in love with your personality and your words. All of this became harder and harder with every time we tried to make plans to see each other and couldn’t. You could come see me but I couldn’t leave because I was still in high school and I lived with my parents.
Nobody knew about you for a while though because I didn’t think that you meant that much to me and I didn’t think this was going to become anything serious, but then it did.
It got serious fast. Just as fast as it all ended. Our entire future, our entire love just ended with a few angry words. You made me crazy mad one day because I couldn’t come see you again and you said some hurtful things and I didn’t talk to you for a few days.
Then you stopped talking to me for a few weeks and I didn’t think anything of it because sometimes that’s what we did, we just stopped talking but we always ended up coming back to each other.
This time we didn’t come back to each other.
We just stopped talking. All these past years just went to hell because I couldn’t come see you. Because distance became too much for the love we shared. A few weeks after we stopped talking, I found out about your new girlfriend, and it killed me inside.
You were the only guy I wanted to be with and the only thing stopping us was distance. Distance that wasn’t going to end until I graduated college. We were supposed to be everything. You were supposed to be my husband and the father of my children.
We were supposed to grow old together.
You were the world to me and distance screwed everything up. I still believe to this day that if distance wouldn’t have been there that we would still be together and that we would probably be engaged if not married by now.
I still remember when you told me that you were going to propose to me the first time you got to see me in forever. We don’t talk anymore and I am still learning to cope with that but for now I wish you the best.
I don’t hate you- not even close. I still love you. I will always love you. Here is to the slightest chance we will get to be together again and be in the same state again. I will always love and remember you.