I commend you.
You did something that neither of us wanted, but it had to be done.
You did something that I couldn't do, even though I knew I needed to.
For the last time in our relationship, you had the strength to carry the heavy load for me. To bear the burden of ending our brief, fiery, fairy tale romance when I wasn't willing to let go. When I couldn't let go.
Because, you see, I am a lover and a romantic. To me, our fairy tale beginning was not just a beginning. It was everything. It was to be written in a book, and cherished for generations. We were perfect.
I couldn't let it go. When the fights started, I chalked it up to stress and life changes. When our conversation dwindled, we were tired.
When you started coming around less and less, you had other priorities like your career (and I surely didn't want to get in the way of that!)
When you didn't return a text, you were out with your buddies. When I felt that ache of loneliness, I was not being strong enough.
When you canceled our plans for the 3rd time in a week, I was being overbearing. I filled our relationship with excuses for our shortcomings.
As the distance between us grew, my drive to fight for us grew too. When you didn't fight for us, I fought harder.
When you told me you weren't sure we should be together, I told you I was. When you said you didn't feel it anymore, I convinced you it would come back, if we only tried hard enough.
When you told me you enjoyed spending time with me, just not the way you used to, I believed it meant we were obviously on the road to recovery.
And the whole time, my happiness was being consumed by you, by us. My happiness became a direct correlation to the 'progress' I thought we had made that week.
You brushed the hair out of my face, and my heart skipped a beat.
The slightest bit of attention when we weren't together sent me over the moon with joy, only to come crashing down again the next time you canceled our plans.
I know you didn't mean it. I know you struggled too. But your struggle was different. I know I will never understand your struggle the way I want to, because your struggle was so different than mine.
Instead of standing up and fighting for what was once great, you pulled back and hid from it. But in the end, you stood up and fought for what was right.
For that, I commend you. Because despite the fear in both our hearts, you walked away.
You stood your ground through my tears and my pleading, you never wavered from what was best for both of us.
You saw that it was slowly killing us both, and you stopped it. I couldn't have done that. I'm a lover and a romantic and a fighter.
For one last time, you were strong when I couldn't be. And I will forever be grateful to you for that.