“I used to believe in forever, but forever’s too good to be true.” – AA Milne
Forever is a word people say way too much without understanding the consequences of such actions that may occur afterward. With him, I saw my future crystal clear. I saw us being together, happy, forever.
I knew what I wanted, I knew what my intentions were, and I thought I knew his. He was and always will be my soulmate, the man that I am in love with and will never fall out of love with.
Every little thing reminds me of him. Every day I wake up wishing he was still mine, that his hand was still interlocked in mine, and we could just go back in time and hit pause.
When I lost him, it killed me. Not only did he take my heart with him, but…
When I lost him, I lost my support system.
He supported me through everything. Through all the decisions I made, from what was for dinner to my life in general he gave me his full support and brutal honesty.
I lost the one thing that cheered me up without even trying.
Even if I was having the worst day, and I was completely angry or upset, all I needed was to hear his voice and I felt better. I needed to be snug in his arms and suddenly all of my demons melted away.
When I lost him, I lost my rock that kept me steady.
When I went through a bump in my life, when something tried knocking me down, he helped me feel secure. He showed me that a lot of things in life are only temporary and it does get better. Now…. I don’t know that.
I lost my strength.
He was my backbone when I couldn’t keep myself up, my motivation when I felt uninspired, my will to keep getting up when I get knocked down.
I lost my family.
He was the one and only family that I chose. He was my family by heart.
I lost my safe place.
He was the one place I felt completely safe, no matter what. When I was with him I was at home, no matter where we were.
I lost my only soulmate
He was perfect for me. No one is perfect, but in my eyes, he was so fucking perfect.
I lost the reason behind my smile.
No matter what I was going through, how I felt, or anything of the sort, he truly made me the happiest girl on this planet. He was the true, genuine reason behind my smile each and every day.
I lost my hero.
He helped me in more ways than I could ever express.He made me feel ways, I will never experience again. Ways any woman would kill for.
I was the luckiest girl, but I lost it.
Right now, the only thing I do have is a heavy heart. I honestly don’t think I could ever love again, I’d rather be alone than to ever put myself through this pain again.
I will always love him with everything in me. My heart will always be bound to him. And no one will ever take his place.
He will forever be my always.